Sunday 5 May 2024

SPM Chapter 7 Part 2: Stairway to Over Here And There

A forbidden apple? That can only mean one thing...

Welcome to the Overthere, Christian Heaven. Fortunately for this game, it has taken the irreverent approach rather than leaning hard into the workings of the theology, so we can just simply say "Christian Heaven" and get the point across rather than having to unpack it in any more detail.

Also, the fact we're combining Greek Underworld with Christian Heaven is what makes me believe there's a third religion forming the basis for the bad place downstairs. My guesses are Shinto (if there is a Shinto afterlife) or Norse. The game seems to be content to portray it as a mix of Tartarus and Hell, though.

Don't worry, Peach'll be here if she's anywhere.

Bowser: Yeah... She's gotta be feeling lonely without her burly, awesome hubby at her side!

Peach, just fine? Peach does not know the meaning of the word! But yes, she herself will be OK, just "in peril".

Luvbi, I don't know how to say this, but if there is any relationship that I would describe as "It's complicated", it would be Mario and Peach.

Tippi: Well... Um...
Bowser: Hey, shut yon trap, Fluffy! You're talking about the WIFE of Lord Bowser!

Oh, Bowser, never change. But Luigi does have a pretty good grasp on things, even if Tippi refuses to put words in Mario's mouth and Bowser is, as usual, woefully misinformed.

Trust me, the crush is very much not one-sided. Perhaps one-and-a-half-sided, total.

I told you it was complicated.

Anyway, let's start on what might qualify as the least fun chapter in the game.

 

The Stairway to Heaven.

There are "80" steps on this staircase, but climbing up them is a veritable maze requiring Flip, Super Jump, and yes, even Glide. There will also be backtracking. And inventory management. Good luck finding which stair you are on and how you get to the stair you want to be on, even if you have already been to the latter.

The Overthere's droning melody doesn't exactly improve things.

This is a Parabuzzy. It's a Buzzy Beetle with wings... Max HP is 1, Attack is 1, and Defense is 3. Even flames won't scorch its hard shell... If you stomp on it, you'll remove those wings... But still, those little limbs that hang down from its shell... They're... a little cute.

Parabuzzy usually float up and down in the middle of gaps. If they don't, they're in optimal Super Jump range. Super Jump really makes it risky business to be in the air.

Already on floor 13! So, so promising!

That's a Spiky Parabuzzy. As you can see, this Buzzy has wings and a spike... Max HP is 1, Attack is 1, and Defense is 3. Even flames won't scorch its hard shell... With the spike and wings and hard shell, I just don't know how to get rid of it... It's a pain to deal with, but still quite adorable...

If you really want to deal with them, Spiky Parabuzzy can still be hit by Cudge if they come close enough. It's score.

Flipping, of course, coming into play on some random stair.

...What the hell are you doing?

I mean, yeah, score.

...Even in the afterlife, cruel gravity is my eternal mistress.

Yay, Slow Flower.

...Coins over there, I guess.

Bouncy clouds! These things have their own Tattle and are in general a good way to make falling down feel even worse than it might be.

Fortunately, there are some loading transitions.

Unfortunately, we may need to go back and forth through these.

...What the fuck what the fuck what the fuck why is the Void in the afterlife

The metaphysical implications are horrifying. The game does not linger on the subject at all.

Nice spot for score, less good for helping us up.

...Do I want to know why that's there? Also, where are we?

Max HP: 10, Attack: 2. This nasty dino has always got to give you a jaw full. Flip to 3-D and check out its funny little limbs!

We saw this enemy back in 5-2, but here's its Catch Card as a freebie! I oneshot it now anyway.

I mentioned inventory management? Scattered around the Stair are these trees with Apples growing from their tops.

Despite the claim that they taste weird, they all heal 5 HP when you eat them. They do some interesting things fed to other characters, though. Also they're good in recipes.

Max HP: 15, Attack: 4. This little thundercloud is darkening a sky near you! Looks a little like cotton candy, but don't bite!

Ruff Puff's Catch Card in a corner here. Don't think we've seen Ruff Puff in the stage yet, but this is indeed their natural habitat.

Hee hee, partially stuck! We're just fine, though.

We do not need more Atk. And yet the game can't give us anything else.

Row of blocks in 3D, nothing for it in 2D.

Boing-oing!

How many of these rooms do I have to go through, anyhow? I thought we got introduced to the idea of this level sooner.

I guess this is where pigs go after a visit to the sausage factory?

I mean, we're already halfway up the Stair!

Stair 43 is when we finally get something to go off other than a big, tall, complicated platforming level.

Aside from the matter of explaining how we get Peach back, I feel like this chapter might actually have been better off if it was just a big, tall, complicated platforming level. That's not SPM, though.

Peach is having a nice big nap right about now.

And she's proving a little hard to reach. I've heard stories of the things I've slept through.

I think this is still quieter than the rackets I've ignored. You underestimate the human ability to get sleep.

Anyway, now we've established the problem, it's time for Luvbi to establish her job, and oh boy, if you didn't like Luvbi before now...

The opinion myopia is off the charts with this one. There is no possible interpretation of how Peach came to eat this fruit that can be explained by her lack of common sense.

So, what is this golden fruit you have so much distaste for?

This is not something taught in schools in the world of the living, Luvbi. I'm sorry that someone who was sent to the Overthere without the brochure wasn't up to date on what the local poisonous foods were. With no idea where she was or where to go, Peach likely ate that fruit because she felt the alternative was starving.

I don't think this afterlife has a hundred days.

Apparently, the afterlife's response to accidental consumption of the contented fruit is just to wait out the timer. What's a hundred years to an eternity of bliss?

...Uh, why is that fruit "taboo"? I mean, yeah, that's like the whole thing with the Tree of Knowledge, but I though that was supposed to be this one...

Because you live here, Luvbi. We don't, and we spend a not-insignificant amount of our lives making sure that we put off coming here as long as possible.

I've made do with less.

...Actually, I think not.

Luigi suggests we just grab any fruit not nailed down and try those.

Luvbi is so irritated by what she deems Peach's "stupidity" that she's going to make a big show of sulking in the corner while we run around on this fool's errand.

Yeah, uh... in case it wasn't obvious, Luvbi was questionably likable back when this game was new.

That's Peach... Princess of the Mushroom Kingdom... and one of the four heroes... She sleeps peacefully...

Peach does have a new Tattle for a more peaceful way to have her knocked unconscious before we get her back in the party.

Obviously, this won't be the fruit.

Every fruit other than the one we need has a unique effect it can inflict on Peach. Thankfully, they all wear off after the cutscene with no ill effects, but still, you do lose the Apple. This will be important later.

Excellent, terrible items I don't want in my inventory cluttering it up so I can't carry the Apples!

Also more of Lakitu up here in the clouds.

...Hahahaha that just looks horrifying.

Red Apples on stair 46. You want to keep one of these.

Jump down into a bouncy cloud to go up higher, that's just how the stage works.

...And that jump does not look comfortable at all.

Thank goodness for the sign. Even if I'm not sure what the Yellow Fruit is for.

Still, we've got one.

Yes, we do have to go past Stair 4 to find our taboo fruit, and then go back down for Peach.

Including these Pink Apples on a tree in 3D only. This one's a big one for recipes, I believe.

Well, that one wasn't an apple tree.

That's a Skellobit. It's a foul monster that's made of bones... Max HP is 10, Attack is 2, Defense is 2. They poke at people with sharp spears... Don't land on the spear when it's pointed up... They were evil in life, so now they must dwell in dark depths of The Underwhere...

That's a Spiky Skellobit. It's made entirely of bones. They are Skellobit leaders... Max HP is 10, Attack is 2, Defense is 2. It has spikes, so don't jump on it... It's said that only the foulest Skellobits are promoted to Spiky Skellobit...

That's a Skellobomber. It's much like a Skellobit, but it has wings... Max HP is 10, Attack is 2, Defense is 2. It might throw its head at you... It also carries Skellobait... Some say Skellobombers were bad Nimbis sent to The Underwhere...

Say hello to the enemy army of Chapter 7, the Skellobits. We met these guys in the Pit, which is really weird- I kinda feel like these guys should've been exclusive to Chapter 7, or at least only 7 and 8. They are skeletal spearmen that don't have too many special traits, but those pointy spears make jumping on them a careful business. If they don't have a spike to discourage it at all times. Prepare to see a lot of these guys.

For now, we've just gotta learn to deal with them. Skellobombers can throw their heads at you, regrowing them.

Ooh, now that sounds taboo.

This one only heals you for 1 HP. Yep, I definitely think that's the one.

...

OK, I know it's my fault for asking, but still.

Back down the staircase we go to find Peach.

You don't have to carry all five of these around, but we'll need two of them to progress and the other two will be used in recipes.

The Yellow Fruit starts out decently likely to work-

Peach wakes up and freaks out over her various perils, before spontaneously falling back into her eternal contented sleep. Really sells these options are entirely for comedy.

It may also be worth remembering what fruits do what...

Because you never know when we might want to have a Super Mushroom in our back pocket.

Pink turns her just peachy.

It certainly looks like something that doesn't want to be eaten.

Yes, it's worked. How can you tell? Mostly just the triumphant musical cue, there's no real indication from appearance alone that this will be any different from any other comedy reaction.

Notice how Peach's overstated reaction knocked the player character off-screen. That's so everyone can react to her awakening.

It was a miracle cure. By the way, you may or may not need to eat.

(Jaydes never gives Peach or Bowser a Continue. I'm not sure if that makes them less alive than Mario or Luigi or the Continue just put our alive selves back in Flipside, but that might come into play.)

Peach recognises Luigi, although she doesn't question his role in the Mr. L shenanigans, or otherwise indicate she remembers them. Better than Bowser.

Who demands that Peach stop paying attention to Luigi and start paying attention to him.

Now that she has friendly faces, she asks where the hell she is.

We get part of the way through before Luvbi crawls out of her sulking hole to yell at Peach in person. I don't think we ever finish the explanation on-screen, so we don't really get Peach's reaction to finding out we're in the afterlife. Shame.

Peach takes a turn with the broken sarcasm detector, and treats Luvbi with a politeness that Luvbi is failing to reciprocate.

Well, at least Luvbi didn't yell at Peach nearly as much as I remember. But still. She offers no indication what Peach did wrong and expects her to learn from it of her own accord.

Tippi: "Smile, nod your head, and as soon as we get the Pure Heart, we abandon her to the skeletons."

Aren't you a sight for sore eyes. Well, OK, Luigi's Super Jump feels like the more useful tool here, but Glide never goes amiss.

"...I still have no idea what's going on, but sounds good."

With Glide, we can now proceed beyond the arrow and head off to new heights.

Including more bouncing!

And bouncing into the few solid platforms on this staircase.

Now that we've grabbed Peach and ran, it's time for the Catholic architecture. Which, you know, is Greco-Roman and makes one wonder if we really left the Greek part of the afterlife behind.

They float in mid-air as inexplicable platforms. Because this is still a platformer.

...Of course they do. That looks super precarious.

You call that worth opening a chest for?

...And of course there's very tall pillars to be very scary to fall off.

...Why all the items, incidentally?

It turns out that all these Overthere Stari areas are annoying in gameplay only, and we're just flying by here. Thankfully.

That's a Spiky Skellobait. These little creatures depend on Skellobombers... Max HP is 5, Attack is 2, Defense is 1. They also have spikes. If you get hit by their chilly breath, you'll be frozen solid... They use the ancient magic of The Underwhere and The Overthere for evil...

This came up when we saw the first Skellobomber, but here's our first Skellobait. They spit ice breath at you sometimes, but are generally easy to kill and just make occupying their space awkward until you do. I feel like they don't come out too often- I usually only see them when the bomber is already carrying one.

This may also be because I'm quick to take out the bombers.

Times like this you wish the game was a bit more fluid. I have to go into a menu between these two actions.

Little nicer in the RPGs, but I'll still take a freebie.

All the actual pantheons and sensible (mostly) architecture is in the Overthere itself, of course, but we're starting to come up on a few.

Nothing on top, but yes, they will put stuff up here sometimes, be on your toes.

...Up here, we've got a cloud with a smile and a switch.

...A pipe from up here to Peach's door?

That's because this NPC is happy to continue the Overthere Stair's stuff to do. We need to help him get big.

And hey, if you did all the negative consequence fruits, you might remember one of them included going big.

Hope you remember which one!

Like most players, I've not got much mind to linger in the Overthere long enough to see if this guy has any reactions to the other Apples.

I did it! Now I'm big as a... Wait, I'm not big at all! Now I just look like I'm at a rock show! Bring me something to make me big!

I did it! Now I'm big as a... Wait, I'm not big at all! I'm even SMALLER! This stinks! Bring me something to make me big!

I did it! Now I'm big as a... Wait, I'm not big at all! Arrrrrgh! What's happening?! Bring me something that'll make me big!

BLEEECCH! What are you making me eat?! Are you trying to end my game?! I said I want to grow big, not swell up with some nasty poisonous reaction!

He does. Maybe if I could carry more items on my person.

There we go, little buddy- or should I say, big buddy?

That's Cyrrus... The talking cloud... This ambitious young cloud is always thinking about getting bigger... Lately, he's become quite a wisecracker...

Yes, climbing the Overthere Stair requires using this guy. I think we're challenging the conceit that Shaydes get up here long ago. Perhaps they've turned into Nimbis by now and just fly up. Luvbi is wondering what's taking so long.

TOO HIGH TOO HIGH TOO HIGH

...

Wait, so the afterlife is still on the planet? Or at least on its own planet? I don't think that was a question the game was prepared to ask when it made this joke.

Told you there was stuff on these. Good stuff, too.

Coins behind the pillars on this pantheon.

And indeed, we're done with the Stair. Really felt a lot lighter for you than it did for me.

Max HP: 1, Attack: 2. It's a Zombie Shroom. They pop out of ? Blocks. It may look like a snack, but it'll snack on you!

Huh. This feels really late for one of these.

...In fact, I've already grabbed a spare at some point. Shame. At least it looks like it sells for decent cash.

White clouds as far as the eye could see... Mario and Co. had climbed through clouds and finally reached The Overthere. "Odd. No party springeth forth to welcometh us," wondered Luvbi aloud. "It mattereth not. Father's shrine is just ahead, so we can walk there with ease." But they would not arrive at the shrine as easily as Luvbi predicted. Why not? Because something unexpected and dramatic was about to happen...

Well, it's not unexpected if you tell us!

Next time: More wandering around a maze of clouds. Some heaven.

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