With Princess Peach at his side, Mario set out once again, bound for adventure. This time, our heroes were tasked with finding the mysterious charmer, Merlee. If Merlon was right, then Merlee was the key to finding the next Pure Heart. Never one to flinch from danger, Mario set out to find Merlee's mysterious mansion. But little did he know, the evil works of dastardly Count Bleck awaited at every turn...
Now, I wouldn't say every turn...
Now how do we turn around Chapter 1's pacing? I know, a swamp level! It's not as bad as it sounds, but the specific use of the phrase "bogging" evokes the exact opposite of the image SPM needs to start projecting.
The level design is pretty, though.
Shame it's only in 2-1.
You know how hard it is to be Peach, unfailingly polite and kind to all, when you have to respond to observations like this? Frankly, it's amazing she only expresses her anger in Super Princess Peach, when she gets access to the power to literally control her emotions like a remote.
Anyway, this has been your introduction to swimming mechanics. For the first time in Paper Mario history, Mario can swim. The fact he is made of paper is about as irrelevant as when we got Boat Mode in TTYD. As for controls, it works exactly how you see them in the platformers: You slowly sink, you mash A to swim up, and you move left and right slowly or very slowly, depending on your momentum.
Drowning has the same penalty as falling in a pit, and I suspect the two are identical mechanics internally. In later levels, where there is a floor to stand on in water, we will learn that, like the platformers, there's no air meter to worry about.
That's a Cheep Cheep. Like most fish, it lives entirely underwater... Max HP is 2. Attack is 1. It swims along lazily minding its own fishy business... No important characteristics of note... It's a fish...
Cheep Cheep has finally appeared in the waters of a Paper Mario game, now that we can swim in them and they can be threatening while not doing anything to bother us.
You can bop them for the points, or you can not do that. Your choice.
Peach's swimming animation, while I'm taking a dip. She doesn't really swing her arms as she moves around like Mario does.
Once again, flip to look up. You never know what they're hiding back here.
Peach's Stylish animation has her grab her dress's hems and preen as she spins around. In addition, while Mario will flip left-to-right and top-to-bottom, Peach will only flip left-to-right. Not that she has much of an upskirt to see, but still.
So what's in the secret pipe?
...Squigs. Squigs.
That was a puzzle of all puzzles. Turns out the door downstairs was locked. I feel vaguely like something wasted my time and I lucked into the solution.
That's a Paragoomba. It is essentially a Goomba... with wings. A flying underling... Max HP is 1 and Attack is 1. Stomp it to turn it back into a Goomba... Then you can stomp it like a normal Goomba, I guess... Ahh... the life of a Goomba...
Paragoombas, much like Paratroopas, will lose their wings if you jump on them. Unlike the RPGs, but like the platformers, they must be defeated with a second bounce as Goombas to take them out.
Picking up the Pal Pills, we can see that, despite using Mario's face on the pickup, they turn into Peach pills when touched. Pall Pills will take the shape of whoever picks them up, and will persist in this shape through character switches- ie, if we switch to Mario, they'll still be Peaches.
Weed-whackers!
And flying from the Piranha is a cooking ingredient, Fresh Veggie. With that said, it actually heals the same as a Shroom Shake without cooking. It cooks into a 15 HP healing item and doesn't cover too many of the two-item ones, but always good to grab.
Proof of Mario still having the Peaches around him.
This door back here has... a guy who looks like he's been in prison.
That's Lock... This guy has that devil-may-care look that girls love... I bet he would fall like a ton of bricks for Peach...
...Er... I'll take your word for it. This is actually a generic sprite we'll see more of later, and it definitely does not look like the sort of girl magnet that Tippi describes it as. It does, however, look like what Tippi means:
The kind of guy who would like to think himself cool by talking to pretty girls.
OK, we're on the right track.
...Grrroann...
The worst part is, this is far from the last time that "talk to an NPC with Peach and he'll start talking because pretty lady" is used as the solution to a puzzle.
The least they could do is at least make them say "you are my density!"
Sometimes, I'm not sure if Peach's overly precocious facade is actually concealing a more sarcastic interior or she's genuinely written that naive, but this is one of those lines that reads like she's giggling to make herself look more harmless than she is. That might just be because SPM has a less precocious Peach in general, though.
Meanwhile, Mario is thrown to the wolves.
Peach still has nonverbal animations, like Mario, and she'll even have her own voice clips for them. They're a little less cartoonishly exaggerated than his, though- combined with an overall lack of moving parts, it's a little hard to convey.
...Well, that was profoundly unhelpful.
...
With all due respect, I think I'll be safer taking my chances with Merlee.
Or in Peach's words: Hmm... nah.
...This feels like a joke at Mario's expense, but I'm not 100% sure what Mario's done (or not done) in recent years to draw her ire. He's all about saving Peach- if anything, he does it too much!
By this point, Partners in Time had been released, a game where Mario did something actively detrimental to Peach's actions. This is, like, the one thing I can think of for her to be mad at him about. Maybe Super Princess Peach, but I'd rather not consider that possibility.
The annoying thing about Peach's guard is that I can never be sure if a pipe is actually inert or I'm just misaligned when I use her power instead of going down the pipe.
We still need this one to go up- Peach has invalidated a few of these in Yold Desert, but she doesn't help us go up.
Into the background, where our Pal Pills do not follow. They'll be pretending they can keep up in the foreground, but keep pace so slowly.
Hit a switch to spawn a door.
...Doesn't look like we can make it over there...
Ooh, Mega Star! You know what that means.
Super Princess Peach, now in glorious widescreen!
There's not much to say about the Mega Star in practice, although there's one thing to keep in mind: Peach is slower than Mario on foot, and they also translate this to Mega form. Peach doesn't usually make it to the end of the segment before reverting to normal. This is probably better for your score, but it still really sucks.
I'm told some flowers can blossom into either speed, but here at last is the counterpart to the Speed Flower, the Slow Flower. You might expect the Speed Flower to be high-risk, high-reward, so the Slow Flower is low-risk, low-reward. They're both triple points, and Slow Flowers make pretty bad platforming aids, so I'm not sure if that's something reflected in the mechanics.
Happy Flower next to a body of water. This is just asking for trouble.
Wow, I carried this thing a ways over. Just missed that biggun, though.
Lots of doors to enter, but let's start with the pipe.
...Uh...
Oh. Pointless Tippi room #3, I think.
That troublesome creature is a Growmeba. It can clone itself over and over again... Max HP is 2 and Attack is 1. If you defeat the main one, the clones will die... The primary one has slightly different moves and looks, so watch closely... If you don't want to bother, you could defeat them all with an item...
Down in the next room is our destination, a room with nothing but a harmless Growmeba. They duplicate themselves over and over again, but will usually stop when there's around 16 of them on screen. If you hit the primary one, they all spontaneously combust.
You see, the thing about Growmebas is you get a lot of points if you take them all out at once. Thoreau especially. So Peach is just going to sit here, in her idle peril animation, while an enemy replicates itself over and over.
Also, shoutouts to Peach's Danger animation.
Well, that solved those problems.
And as a reward for our efforts, a large chest appears before us. Thoreau, you're no longer in single billing!
Hell yeah, let's get ourselves the king of kabooms!
Although he's going to be holding us up for a "vibe check". Peach got plenty of that from Super Princess Peach, she'll be just fine.
That one's a cute non-verbal.
So what, exactly, is a vibe check?
A bunch of questions that have nothing to do with anything, least of all each other. Every question is answered with a triumphant "yes" no matter which option you select.
...I thought those presents were the cookies and milk.
During revision? That's the last thing I want to do!
Well, lucky we came into this question with Peach, because it turns out Mario can't look Boomer in the eye and say that.
Even Boomer is poking fun at himself.
This was back in the good ol' days where "shopping online" was something done as more of a hobby than something you did regularly. As of the year 2020, this became the dominant way to interact with the world (by medical recommendation), and now this question is quaint.
...How?
I think that's just the natural state of human existence at this point.
Even Peach is closing her eyes.
Now that this completely insane ramble is over, we can move on. Yes, all the Pixls are going to be like this. Why do you think no one complains they stay in the background and shut up?
Now blow yourself up over and over for us!
Boomer is a really useful Pixl outside of just blowing up cracked walls- he does double damage to enemies, and also pierces some particularly resilient hides. He tends to be a Pixl of choice for some annoying enemy arrangements, especially since the sorts of enemies that you're irritated by are usually positioned in ways that make Boomer a good idea but other Pixls (like Thoreau) tricky to land a hit. "But what about the fuse timer?" In those situations, a slight delay while you move back and the enemy moves over Boomer is exactly what you want, and hey, pressing 1 again to detonate is instant this game.
This can be done through the same Quick Access menu as characters and items, being the third option.
And that's why we need you to stop talking.
That's Boomer. This Pixl excels at blowing things up... Boomer joined your party after you met him in Gloam Valley... He's happy to obliterate anything for the legendary hero...
Tattle.
Secret back behind here. You can faintly make it out.
Old Man Watchitt is the crotchety mayor of Yold Town. His job is to keep people from going to the ruins. You know, lawsuits and all that. WATCH IT!!!
...I could sue Yold Town for that? At any rate, various NPCs also get Catch Cards- and indeed, I believe we had access to some in I missed back in Flipside, but they were located in an old school DKC-style "jump down a random pit" room I forgot about. I think I wind up getting back there eventually.
Shielding Jawbus knocks us back, like any enemy attack would, but doesn't turn it around. Looks like Peach doesn't have a way around his gimmick.
Boomer works, though, and Boomer is also "necessary" to get past this brick wall. You can, with precise jumping, bounce off Jawbus's head and get up there, but it turns out Boomer is also necessary in those rooms to get what we need.
...Well, OK, you can skip that, too, but at that point you're actively trying.
It's possible to pick up and throw Boomer, but for most purposes his timer is too short.
One at a time, we can see...
That this room is a bit of a dead end. Clearly we needed to enter from the other side.
On the plus side, most enemies we couldn't deal with before in some way can be taken out by Boomer.
That bizarre creature is a Shlurp. It has tough skin and an appetite for everything... Max HP is ??, Attack is 2, and Defense is ??. No attack will work... But Shlurps are just as fragile inside as they are tough on the outside... Maybe you should try feeding it something that would give it indigestion...
Including the new guy. Shlurp can only die on ingesting a bomb, and will go down on the first go. Yes, that means there will be Shlurp recolours that need a few more bites.
Aha, here's a room we can go down.
There's some blocks in 3D we can go down into...
For some coins.
It's the other room we needed.
So what do we get for hitting this switch?
Spawning a new door!
These tiny little puffs from Cherbils don't knock you back when you get hit in Peach's shield. This is incredibly valuable to know in some later maps.
If I deploy it.
Before we go, one last reward down here for the player who keeps their 3D glasses on.
That beast is a Swooper. It likes to dangle from the ceiling in dark, dank places... Max HP is 3 and Attack is 1. Watch your head; it will swoop down on you... It will swoop back up after it swoops down, so jump on it when you can...
An encounter with Swooper, who's doing his TTYD movement patterns (sans HP draining) and not his platforming patterns of "swoop once and then fly away". That behaviour is usually best deployed in auto-scrolling levels, and I don't think SPM has any of those.
...Surprisingly.
And two new Catch Cards to add to the collection!
Max HP: ??, Attack: 2. This hungry beast really sucks... stuff up! Bombs give it a bad case of heartburn.
Max HP: 3, Attack: 1. Swoopers aren't so bad, they're just lonely. Strangely, they greet visitors by snacking on their heads. ...This could explain why they have no friends.
Shlurp's is pretty boring, but Swooper's is hilarious.
Peach gets her first End of Chapter of many.
On the far side of a beast-ridden swamp, Mario and Co. found an imposing residence. "This must be Merlee's Mansion!" squealed Princess Peach with glee. If our friends could only find the Pure Heart quickly, their quest here would end. But when has fate ever set Mario on such a simple path? Brimming with anticipation, our plucky heroes plunged into Merlee's Mansion...
Say goodbye to the Gloam Valley aesthetic, we're going to be spending the majority of our time inside Merlee's mysterious mansion.
Although we do at least get to see what's lying around outside.
Forgive the explosion, I have some issues with pressing 1 instead of other buttons, and Boomer sticks around longest. 3D shows you a Coin Block over on this side.
The place might be different now, but they haven't changed the sign. Although this one is telling people to go inside, so...
You can Tattle blocks like this to hear what's in them, but you might as well hit them anyway.
Climbing up as Peach for the animation, and readying myself for a triumphant leap.
Landing on top of the mansion for a Stop Watch. Same as it was in the RPGs, about as useful.
By the way, flip into 3D while you're up there.
There's a chest on a balcony to drop to.
Max HP: 1, Attack: 1. This nasty critter will slow you down. It's just so easy to get lost in those dreamy eyes.
Oh, that's an enemy we won't see for a bit. These guys have different status ailments they can drop on us, although as you can tell from their max HP, having a Catch Card isn't going to help us at all.
Let's go in now.
This is one of Merlee's pets, a Gnip... They're just getting you out of harm's way when they kick you out of the mansion... They look scary, but they're actually quite nice...
And immediately we are met by Merlee's territorial pets, the Gnips. Gnip cannot be defeated, as suggested by the lack of enemy stats, although it can be jumped on (no points or Stylishes, it's the same system as Shlurp).
If they catch you in their mouths, they spit you back out outside. Despite the fact that the Tattle is kind of a massive spoiler for the twist this chapter is going to have, I don't believe Gnip appears when you revisit the chapter later on.
The crystal ball is just for decoration, clearly, but if Merlee set up shop, she'd probably do so here, and all the back rooms we're about to explore would be off-limits.
Ah, hello, it's one of the maids! One of the weird things about analysing this chapter, in addition to Tippi's dialogue kinda definitely tipping their hand about what is going to happen, is that this character is a very recognisable one, the sort of character people might look at the game and go "what's her deal?". As a result, the surprise the game has spent quite some time setting up is probably not going to be one at all.
Especially when Mimi introduces herself using her real name. I'm sure this is an innocent bystander who just happens to have the same name as Count Bleck's shapeshifting minion who's setting a trap for us.
She's such a bratty teenager even here. We haven't seen her in her normal shape in Castle Bleck and we already recognise her. Probably means we can't expect her to pull anything like Doopliss.
Which naturally means our life will be longer if we do not go into that room.
On the other hand, Merlee might be in that room as bait...
...Translation: We should 100% be going into every single room that is not that one.
That's Mimi... I guess she works for Merlee... There's something odd about her, though... Let's keep an eye on her...
I do think there was supposed to be some clues this maid wasn't on the up-and-up, but they went a little overboard.
This is Gnaw, Merlee's favorite pet. It's certainly the biggest of the bunch... But some mean person tied it down... And I think it's worried that this mean person wants to hurt you... Good Gnaw!
And at this point, they're not even trying to hide it. I'm not going to dignify the game with doing the same.
Look at me go in a bad door, Mimikins!
Well, if that isn't a Mushroom that is being pulled along by a wire.
Doesn't look like Thoreau quite reaches.
Saw that one coming.
What have we got in the punishment room...
That bashful specter is a Boo. It's very fond of dark places... Max HP is 4 and Attack is 1. It will disappear if you stare at it too long... But it will reappear and chase after you the moment you turn your back on it... To outfox it, let it approach with your back turned, then attack or use an item...
Ah, the introduction to Boo. Unlike in the platformers, where Boo was invincible, you can kill these ones, even if you can't touch them while looking at them. The trick is that they can't see you looking at them if they're not looking at you.
Like so.
Popping up back where we started, with the Mushroom ready to taunt us.
If you hug the wall, you can see that there's a room of some sort for the Mushroom to retreat into. Fungah, foiled again.
Of course I fell in because I switched Mario. Oh well, back up we go.
In here, we have the tauntingly dangling Mushroom. Mimi's traps need work.
Admittedly, it's a little tricky to point and laugh when Thoreau clips right through it.
I tried it. It thought of that. At least we get to keep the Mushroom this time.
Although all we have to kill in here is a Shlurp.
One more room on the second floor has a coin trail!
No double coins, but the trail does wander around in the third dimension.
Whatever's at the bottom of this pit didn't interest me enough to mention, apparently.
Although I did float over for more money. Those coins will make all the difference, I'm sure.
Surprisingly, no traps here in the room Mimi told us to enter.
...Well, unless you count the obvious.
I wonder if all the other rooms were Mimi's prototype traps, and her telling us not to go in there is embarassment.
Oh well. Nothing for it but the good old standby.
Yes, this works. Peach's parasol is made of some seriously heavy duty stuff.
Oh, and yes, the devs very much expect you to flip into 3D to solve this. You know, like any other puzzle in the game.
You're supposed to ride it back up like an elevator.
Hello, that's an Ultra Shroom pickup already? We haven't even found Super Shroom Shakes yet! The game, sadly, does not have a higher tier of pickup, although admittedly, it doesn't really expect you to get much more than 50 HP to beat the game. You will surpass it, but not by enough that 50 isn't still a significant heal.
Flip up here, and you can see some precarious ledges to cross. I think 2D should be more or less fine, honestly. No chance of falling down, either.
Oh, those pillars. That explains the 3D.
Although when you're put on the wrong side of the room...
I know exactly what we're using this on.
Right, so how exactly do we get to this lock?
Gnaw can't kick you out of the level, since he's chained in place, but he can call some Gnips to do it for him.
Mimi just abandoning her previous insistence we not check other rooms to tell us to just look everywhere. I think that supports the hypothesis that Mimi designed the other traps as ideas to kill us, rejected them, and since her best trap failed, is now trying to recoup whatever investment she can.
This is going really badly.
As far as it looked, I'm not sure how to get this door to open as Peach.
Be free, big scary doggy!
And it goes right for Mimi.
Time for the comic chase scene to ensue!
Tippi: I can tell the Gnips and Gnaw do not like the new management, and I'm also suspicious of Mimi.
Also Tippi: So why did Gnaw go and attack Mimi?
I wonder why that monster went straight after her and ignored us? It seems weird, doesn't it?
The textdump does have a second line I assume is used for Peach if she manages to open the lock. Perhaps I should try harder some other time.
This seems to be a Tippi line in both cases.
...End of chapter already?
I dunno, I kinda feel like there ought to have been a little more to it than that? We had outside the mansion, one stealth section with Gnip and Mimi's gauntlet of traps?
Mario and friends kept up their search, delving ever deeper into the mansion. Wherever they looked, though, they found no sign of Merlee. Where was this mysterious woman? "Ah, maybe... this way..." So said Tippi, trying to sense the Pure Heart's location... With dread dangling like a broken chandelier, our heroes hurried through corridors...
"Dangling like a broken chandelier". What a metaphor.
That feels like a chapter transition for the sake of having one. Possibly they didn't know where to stick the fourth chapter, and just decided to split this bit into its own section.
We start with a sketchy looking vase on top of a ? block. That looks too vivid not to be background detail.
Ignoring it and heading into the next room over offers some mild-to-moderate spoilers about what the hell is going on before the inciting incident. I imagine the developers safely assumed every first-time player was going to interact with the vase on sight.
...I think that clock on the wall does actually tell the system time.
The vase exists in 3D, which means there is absolutely nothing we can do without either touching it or knocking it off its block.
Both actions which will knock it down and smash it. First rule of mansions in fiction: If there's a vase on a pedestal that is not being used to hold flowers, it's getting smashed.
That's a vase of some kind... It couldn't have cost more than 100 coins...
We'll be fine.
And now someone is going to scream at us about it.
Mimi has escaped Gnaw extremely quickly, and without missing a beat, instantly assumes open control over Merlee's mansion. You'd expect she'd at least say it was Merlee's favouritest vase.
Next time, put it on something I don't need to jump on.
Coins have been inflated to the point of worthlessness, I refuse to believe there is a currency that is ten thousand times worse.
We can take the hired help, you four.
Peach is probably thinking of her castle vaults, back in her home dimension and Tippi is offering no indication how to get back.
Mimi does not accept shiny golden pellets, for being too worthless. It's all about those shiny sparkling rubies.
Welcome to the chapter someone on the dev team added as a joke and forgot the game still hadn't hit its stride yet at this point in the story.
Mimi's strength of character manages to sell enough of it if you're here for the story, but the fact remains this is the absolute worst idea to stick in Chapter 2 of a game with a slow start mechanically.
Because this work is legitimately done manually.
That room we found earlier now has Mimi acting as our loan shark, with all the paraphernalia hanging up still there.
The game has already forgotten we can play as Princess Peach and assigns the debt to Mario, despite Peach having done all of the breaking and being-put-in-debt.
Oh, and by the way, this is a remote interaction I've never tested but found out later: While you have a Rubee debt to Mimi, the Return Pipe is disabled.
The block contains a single coin. Not that it increments our Rubee counter.
We need to use Peach to get over here.
This is just a break room.
This guy will tell us a secret if we pay him 100 Rubees. Is it worth it? I'll let you be the judge of that.
That's Conn... He seems to always be in the Mushroom room... He's a little uppity... But deep inside, he hates being alone and loves it when people talk to him...
Charging them their "get away from Mimi" Rubees isn't the way to go there, man.
This block will give you a Mushroom, because there are things in this level that can deal damage to you.
Although the slave driver is happy to scam us out of hard-earned Rubees if we need it. It's relatively easy to avoid all sources of damage, so try not to bother with this.
That's an Ackpow... Basically a nasty warden employed by Mimi... They like to act important, but they're paying off debts just like everyone else...
Snorts.
WHOA!
...I'm not saying I don't sympathise, but still "WHOA!". Also now "Whoa!" in a different way, is she putting these guys in addiction, too?
That's Cott... This guy is another captive... He seems the type to try not to think about the harshness of reality...
Trying and failing.
Secret room here for a Catch Card.
Max HP: 4, Attack: 1. These spooks only approach when your back is turned. They'd be awesome at "Red light, green light"! ...Except they bite you if they win.
I don't think Boos typically bite, just spook. Hell, their modern designs tone down the teeth.
This one's our stop.
Welcome to the ultimate in slavedriving technology. Also, you gotta appreciate the wall-mounted office fan.
These guys are being forced to work to pay off their massive debts... They're all trying to earn Rubees so they can get out of this place...
There are a good dozen or more slaves in here, and every single one of them has this line from a Tattle.
Despite holding whips and snapping them against the ground regularly, the Ackpows are never depicted actually whipping anybody. I'd say it was considered against Nintendo's policies, but I feel like those would've kicked in a little earlier than this.
This room is powering the lights, it seems.
This is an absolutely, critically important step: Talk to this guy before hitting the block.
You must select that you want to do some work in order for that work to be paid.
The exchange rate on this exercise is "hit the block once, get one Rubee".
These will damage you. It's easy enough to avoid, although since they are in the way of how you get Rubees, I can see an inexperienced player having some issues.
Just imagine this 100 times. With a ball of electricity that periodically comes by to zip under your feet.
Well, pfft to you too.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO! You wanna live a slacker life, be my guest! Slacker. But you'll never get out of here unless you start working! Unh!
You call that a day's work?! Wow. Worst peon of all time. Pro tip: get a work ethic. But a promise is a promise. For your sad amount of work, a sad amount of Rubees!
Unh! Now THAT'S what I call a day's work! Feel it! You must love those Rubees... Do you dream about them? Do you snuggle with them? Hey, it's none of my business! For a great day of work, a great pile of Rubees!
I'm not 100% sure what the exchange rates are on these services, or how much grinding you need to do for the best message, but here is the variety of responses you can get. The first one is if you leave without earning any Rubees at all.
Oh, and as a little note, the slaves are all hitting their own blocks if viewed in 3D. Which means whoever positioned them can perceive them.
Standing on top of their blocks is allowed.
Right, what do you have to tell us.
Neither Mario nor Peach's mum ever gets to appear outside of the ending of Yoshi's Island- and even that was Mario's, for a very brief moment. We're not sure who either of Peach's parents are, and what they taught her about politics, running a kingdom, or indeed, how to not get kidnapped.
...Which probably means they were a little vague on the whole "don't talk to strangers" thing.
This code is the same every playthrough, so if you know it ahead of time, you can go ahead and input it for free. I'm told it's goroawase (ご苦労さま) for "you've been working really hard", although I have no proper citations. I believe it is goroawase, though, since such random numbers being consistent across files feels like there's something relevant.
Whack the guy's face on the way out for that info, why don't we?
That's Tib... This poor boy seems to have had some problems with his love life... He missed many chances to meet girls in the past because he's a bit clueless... But then he got a girlfriend and came here seeking a charm to keep it going well... But because he's kind of clueless, he just got kidnapped instead...
There's another unfortunate wandering around in the halls. One with a bit more of a backstory, too. Tippi, I don't think he got kidnapped because he's clueless. We fell for her trap, didn't we?
The far left door is another non-working room.
This guy will explain the point of the VIP room: It's a higher-paying job than the block-hitting one. Don't bother with the block-hitting one more than necessary.
5963.
That's Cade... This young man is another captive here... He's a smart young lad... He loves puzzles and solving problems...
It'd help if he could glide to that one room.
...Eh, I have the spare Rubee...
...That does indeed qualify as helpful information, I suppose.
That's Cap... This hood has all the info fit to sell... I don't think he makes much money. He just does it to stave off boredom...
I suppose it's as good a way to do it as any. Him not charging much means he doesn't get too much in the way of paying any debts, and also means he doesn't expect a profit for himself like the other guys.
I'd say I have a plan, but clearly I don't.
That's Vic... This guy is another one of the captives... He's working to earn Rubees... I bet he's even forgotten which charm he came here for in the first place...
I can only assume he no longer needs it. For some dark reasons, depending on what exactly those reasons were.
One more guy hiding in 3D. He's the guy we need to find.
Yes, we're not hitting a block 10,000 times to learn that.
This is Stock... He's a high-level informant who has the best info there is... He's hiding here BECAUSE he has the best info. Or... maybe he just doesn't like crowds.
Finishing the passcode has no "enter" button, you just get buzzed in automatically. This applies for all passcodes in the game, and I thought I'd have time to show the finished code. No dice.
In we go, then.
This guy is being forced to work to pay off his massive debt... He's running to earn Rubees so he can get out of here...
Running the hamster wheel! The glorious, hilarious hamster wheel.. I am convinced whoever had the idea to make the player get enslaved by Mimi and have to work off their debt by fuelling the mansion's power was doing it to have a scene where Mario had to run a hamster wheel.
If it was supposed to be kinkier, there'd be a maid dress for Peach.
Unlike the last guy, this guy seems to have a thing for calling his subordinates "gerbils". You'd think both Ackpows would have a preference, but I guess VIP means VIP treatment.
...Maybe the insult should've started with the letter "P". This is the Very Important Peasants room, after all.
This room is air-conditioned, rather than running on a creaky old fan. Yay.
I don't know what the exchange rate is on power generated to Rubees earned in this room is. It's probably somewhat hard to calculate owing to how imprecise "one revolution" is.
There is no confusion about running the hamster wheel without talking to the Ackpow to start payment.
...I'm not sure what that was for, but sure, let's go right ahead.
We can't get into the hamster wheel at all without having talked to him.
The idea of Peach, who has no indication she ever wears anything but her high heels, running a hamster wheel is actually kind of amusing too.
If you stop moving, the Ackpow will ask if you're asking to be let out. Not yet, sir.
Revolutions, sparks coming out of the counter, I've got no idea what they're counting, they're just counting it.
Butt-sliding and running along the corners seem to be the best way to get some speed, although who knows whether this helps you.
OK, so what did that get me?
Nope. Not even halfway.
This time, I pressed down the movement key and left it running until enough time passed that, despite the game being an emulation, the virtual Wiimote disconnected.
I better get the Rubees I need leftover from this...
Nope. Good thing I had that first attempt. Just imagine doing this all the way to a million.
You call that working, gerbil? Me, I call that a miserable excuse for labor. I guess you still have some pay coming, though. C'mere. Nibble a few Rubees, gerbil.
His "low payment" line. You do have to move to get him to let you out.
How the hamster wheels look in 3D. Although this raises the question of what they're plugged into.
Right, so what can you tell us?
This number is also the same for every playthrough. If you know this number, you do not have to do any Rubee-grinding whatsoever. If the code was randomly generated, Super Paper Mario would lose like three points on a ten point rating scale on its own. As it is... the grinding is funny, as a joke, but...
Its goroawase (良い風呂に入る) appears to be "take a good bath". Which is a nice combination of something decadent Mimi would enjoy doing often enough to mumble in her sleep, and also something to say to us hard workers who ran a hamster wheel for long enough our Wiimote batteries lost interest.
I don't think Mimi has a boyfriend, nor does she interest in having one that isn't Count Bleck, but this isn't "she doesn't like men" so much as "she doesn't consider any other men to be anything more than her pets, at best." If she did have a boyfriend, she would totally mumble his number in her sleep.
Hey, may as well. If you enjoy grinding, this may or may not be a good way to get yourself a ton of easy Points. There are far better ways of grinding.
Anyway, after floating over to the break room with a Mushroom, you need to flip into 3D for something.
...A talking big chest?
NOPE! It's another Pixl. The amount of new powerups any given Chapter gives us is all over the place, with Chapter 2 giving us a new character and two Pixls compared to Chapter 1 giving us one character and one Pixl. To be fair, flipping into 3D has given us far more than Peach and this Pixl combined.
41262816.
You mean closing your eyes is a necessary part of this process? Not in my experience.
You're a technicolour fairy who's gone completely insane, which means I'm required to tolerate you.
I just spent half an hour of this video game running a hamster wheel because someone on the dev team thought it be funny. Forgive me for not being entirely thrilled right now.
By which you mean you're going to have some actually interesting gameplay?
Never mind. It's counting.
Now, I'm not going to be skipping any numbers.
Or posting them out of order.
...Mario has fallen asleep. He fell asleep back at Three.
How do you count to π?
Sir, that is not a number.
That jolts Mario awake.
You cannot tell me that with a straight face that I am now more thrilled with this gameplay, after being put through all that tedium. Slow starts can be tolerated by many RPG players. Eventually, you have to put up enjoyable gameplay.
Says the one that's the hardest to us- actually, no there's a worse one later.
This is a backstory element that turns up much later. Not an important one, but...
Wait, hold on, it took 500 years after that to put all the Pixls in chests?
Now we get Slim, a Pixl that's probably inferior in non-mandatory use to Peach.
He's Paper Mode, but if you're standing still, he's also Outta Sight. Which are both highly situational and it's far easier to just use Peach's shield. It also deploys faster than Slim.
You know what else is fun? Spaceship shooters. Battle gauntlets. Actual platforming and exploring.
That's Slim. This Pixl flips you sideways, making you invisible... Put in a box by Merlee's ancestors, he was protected by the mansion's masters... He loves excitement and is excited to travel with the hero of legend...
Thankfully, I picked you up after the grinding.
On the upper floor, we can find the real progress.
A Rubee deposit that'll bypass our debt entirely! No way Mimi will let us in there easily.
Although with that said...
She dropped the key in here too.
This is Dupp... He's one of Mimi's captives here in Merlee's Mansion... He's a thief by profession... He has a good nose for good stuff and where it is... But he must not have a nose for danger if he got nabbed and put in here...
No, 3D is not sufficient this time.
Peach sliding through the barriers as skinny as a twig.
The barriers press together here as they move around, but you must go through both separately. They're going the wrong way around to do a double.
Of course. A safe. With a code.
Eight characters to win our freedom. The odds of us getting it right on a guess is one in a hundred million.
Thank goodness the answer is posted online!
RUBEES! More Rubees than Link can shake a sword at!
By the way, in 3D, this ledge doesn't extend all the way to the wall. Jumping down puts you on the bottom floor, right outside Mimi's place.
That's Mimi... I guess she works for Merlee... She's demanding 1,000,000 Rubees in compensation for the vase you broke... Who is this girl, anyway? I don't like this...
You didn't consider that her evil reveal? I have no idea what you think is happening right now if you think Mimi is still working for Merlee, and honestly, I don't want to know.
There are four options with Mimi's Black Void Loan Sharks, three of which are useless since that electronic display tells you your balance anyway.
You have an outstanding Rubee balance on this loan of [X]. Remember to make your payments on time! And remember... BIG SMILE!
You don't need anything? Well, golly, then how about you GET LOST RIGHT NOW! I HAVE WORK TO DO!
Yeah, well, that's just super. Know what I love? Rubees. Go get me some, slacker!
Responses if you pick 'em. I love how Mimi doesn't care at all about acknowledging some guy she has under her thumb loves her. It's all about her, her, her.
Take this, you little brat.
Mimi wasn't actually expecting anybody to come back with a repaid debt. Which makes it sound as if she's got some tricks up her sleeve to keep the debt going. I do not believe there's anything to support that, although that would imply anyone ever grinded up the million with the hamster wheel.
If you did it with the block, you have way better things to do with your time.
...You had a curse associated with it? I'd have done anything to make sure nobody raised that many Rubees if I did. Including not leaving a safe with all the Rubees in the slave's access. Electrical barriers or no...
Mimi raises into the air and screams at us for having foiled her evil scheme, and now we can see one of my favourite details about Mimi: on top of being a shapeshifter, she also changes her dress to suit the occasion. We will never actually see her recycle her maid or bank teller costumes for the rest of the game- and in fact, pretty much every Mimi appearance will be like this.
The bank teller costume is the closest she comes to wearing pants, although she changes her skirt's silhouette often enough I wonder how much of a burden this was on the designer's side.
...
This is a Mario game, by the way.
Having beaten the game and examined a lot of the lore, I still cannot explain why Mimi explodes here, or what having "broken her curse" entails. All the slaves are set free by the end of the chapter anyway, and while we can now Return Pipe if we wanted, I don't think anything in this chapter was magically powered. The electric barriers are still up, too.
We now have an exit to the level.
Now that is a good question.
Our objective still hasn't changed.
Even if you did the grinding legitimately, you must have found Slim to progress. Well, OK, speedrunners can get by, although I'm less sure if they can get the Rubees without him.
The mysterious handmaid Mimi disappeared in a bizarre explosion... What exactly was her plan, and why did she try to enslave Mario and friends? After the incident, Princess Peach noticed stairs going down. "Here we go!" she said. "I wonder if Merlee is down here?" thought our heroes as they traded worried glances... The two solemnly made their way down, knowing there was no other path to follow.
Of course Merlee is behind stairs blocked by bars, though.
Next time: Mimi makes me ask serious questions.
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