PM Chapter 7 Part 3: Window to the Soul

Here we are, climbing our way up to the Crystal Palace. Music's pretty, at least.

We cannot proceed any higher than this, for now.

Our path is down under here.

Blow up this wall, and...

Mysitcal chamber, behold. They're really ratcheting up the mystique.

In order to find the objective, we need to walk through the wall on the far end. Not "blow it up", just walk right through it like it's Ocarina of Time. Merle's final hint, delivered in panic as we left his house, was a hint to solve this exact puzzle, and it screams as if the developers were not prepared for how hard it would be to get the player to figure this one out.

What a strange place this is! It's bright even in the cave... This must be the small cave that Merle told us about. There's something strange about this place... Even the walls seem suspicious to me for some reason.

Goombario's Tattle is helpful.

You climb up a steep mountain and break the cracked wall beyond the stairs. You enter an icy cave. The room is filled with crystal pillars, and your eyes deceive you. You think for a moment that it's a dead end. You don't trust your eyes. You keep moving forward. You find something helpful once you break the illusion.

And if you were to walk all the way back to Merlon (as a reminder, Merlon is supposed to be the game's hint system!), he would give you the hint to walk through the wall as the next hint after "give the snowmen the Scarf and Bucket". He doesn't even mention the Duplighosts on the Kooper switch, he skips right to this! I never really noticed how desperate they were to make sure you knew what to do here, but they really set their hand.

In here, we can find not only the object we need to progress, but also a mystical ghost of a sage to impart on us some additional wisdom.

Not that strange. I know all your descendants.

Interesting that Merlar only acknowledges the men, but I guess the player never needs to find Merluvlee, Merlee and Merlow by this point.

...Come to think of it, do they mean the same Stars we're here to rescue, or a cosmic thing of greater significance that the Star Spirits are subservient to?

...Well, where Stars were honoured. Even without Bowser's presence, the old ruin isn't much of a place of worship, what with no worshippers or even remembrance to its existence.

I'm not sure how seriously we've been meant to take Merle and Merlar's respective long speeches- the fact Merle's culminated in an ordinary Scarf suggests "not very"- but at this point, we are well and truly into the "tongue-and-cheek" section of their conversations.

...You mentioned the short version?

...

So yeah. Whatever this story was about (I have my doubts there is a solid idea of what the story is about, considering how little of it we see), the game does not care about it and has Mario just dozing his way through to skip it. I can only imagine this reflects one or more of the writers' frustration with overlong exposition in RPGs that try to take themselves seriously in similar circumstances, although it makes Mario look like far more of an asshole than he is.

I'd joke that this sounds like the sort of joke that the modern Paper Marios would make, but they actually do- well, Mario & Luigi Paper Jam does.

Something something "Bowser's men in a place they were not invited is always bad news". This joke story has nothing to do with what's going on, and while I could probably complain that the exposition dumps they're riffing on are not that bad, there probably is a kernel of truth to this accusation- you really don't need to tell someone the backstory of a location in mandatory dialogue if "this is a cool ancient ruin to explore" was the takeaway. Leave the "where did it come from" to the nerds who care. As one of their number, I appreciate not having to mash through it on the second playthrough as much as others appreciate not having to mash through it on the first.

Mario tries to pretend desperately that he wasn't sleeping.

Merlar decides not to object.

The only thing that story seemed to tell us, mechanically, was "we need the Star Stone to get in.

We didn't even get that! We only got the short, short version.

That was a lot of words to give us a random plot collectible. We don't even need to go out of our way to use this.

Here's the "go through the wall" in action.

As one final punchline to the entire dialogue with Merlar, using the Star Stone makes it impossible to ever visit her cave again. She's going to be trapped there forever now, isn't she? Hope she's one of the kinds of ghosts that can move on.

The Star Stone assembles three massive staircases to make our way up to the top of the mountain.

That's a formation worth Fire Shelling.

Mega Jump (3 BP) is a 6 FP attack that does four more damage than a normal Jump in one blow. I think it's counting from the 6 total damage of a Jump attack- ie, without Atk buffs, it should do 10 to a Defenceless enemy. In practice, it's usually surpassed by Power Bounce, D-Down Pound and... just Jumping because of the fact that Atk bonuses stack. With all three Atk bonuses, Jump is doing 12 damage to Mega Jump's 13, for no FP cost. This is why comboes are so powerful.

The second stop on the staircase has a drop-down to find a Star Piece.

And the top has a Heart Block to heal us before we enter the Crystal Palace.

As a strange note, this impressive room is clearly meant as "the entrance to Crystal Palace", but in practice, this is really part of the dungeon. Despite this, it still plays "Over Shiver Mountain" and not the dungeon theme.

Now we have entered the Crystal Palace, home to beautiful yet mysterious music. This is a dungeon that successfully captures the imagination.

At the far side of the hallway is a locked door.

Push the button, and we can change it to a different locked door. These two doors do go someplace different, but we're clearly not using any of them right now.

Into the door that isn't locked, then.

This door starts with a red X on the ground. There's nothing we can do about this one.

This is a Swoopula. Swoopulas attack from the air and cling to you to suck your HP. Max HP: 8, Attack Power: 2, Defense Power: 0. Hit the A Button repeatedly to fight it off or else it'll keep sucking your HP. You can't jump high enough to attack them while they're hanging from the ceiling. An earthquake attack ought to work, though. Flying party members, like Bow or Parakarry, can also attack them with ease. If they fall and begin to flap around, you can attack them by jumping as well.

Swoopula (Lv. 22) is one of the first enemies that hangs from the ceiling we've seen in a while (fair play, this is probably one of the first dungeons with a ceiling we've seen in a while), and they take Swooper to a terrifying conclusion- although the "ceiling" bit is pretty trivial now that we have so many good flying party members. The ability to steal 2 HP 5 times unless you mash is not to be trifled with. Zap Tap is a must when dealing with them. They're original to Paper Mario.

Get down from there.

...I didn't bring Zap Tap, didn't I?

Oh well, we can make up the difference.

So long, Money Money. Hopefully I have the cash.

Now this formation is worthless.

...Although I can't jump on you from down here.

Bye!

That passage found us a Blue Key to open the Blue Door.

The door in the mirror unlocks too.

Although in here, blowing up this wall only works on the outside.

Money! This is a Coin Block.

...And the one on the other side is a Coin Block too.

...You mean to tell me the big thing in the middle of the Crystal Palace wasn't a giant mirror this whole time?

Then what was causing our reflections...

Oh. Right.

(They are challenging us to a fight, the spinning animation was just on an off frame.

Now then, I believe I mentioned Bombette being the other party member you want them to transform into.

If a Duplighost transforms into Bombette, any fire attack will instantly kill them without hurting you. This includes Bombette's own Bomb, although Power Bomb and Fire Shell will get multiples.

That's them on alert.

Now, while we're obviously expected to take a peek in this room...

What if we tried to leave the dungeon from the mirror world?

They thought of that. Star Piece for your troubles, but you're only leaving on the normal side of the looking glass.

Super Shroom here. The opposite side had a Save Block instead, I believe.

Huh. Instead of a red X, it's the breakable kind.

The Duplighosts have returned as regular enemies! Also the Red Magikoopa returns from Mt. Lavalava- that was level 21, so it still gives good EXP. Even if it is less than the Swoopulas do.

And I am not dealing with it.

If you use Zap Tap, Bow is another good pick for a Duplighost target.

The 1x6 damage combo is broken by Zap Tap, leaving you with one damage and them with a bruised hand.

...Shooting Star. Well, this direction was a bust.

(Though I don't really need this anymore, do I...)

Let's go down this time.

Yellow Magikoopa also makes an appearance. There's a lot of Magikoopas in here.

P-Down, D-Up (2 BP) gives +1 Def in exchange for -1 Atk. Well, OK, that's not quite true. The Defence bonus isn't technically a Defence bonus- except that's a good thing. All attacks, including attacks that are supposed to pierce your Defence stat, are reduced in damage by 1. For 2 BP- although all the Atk bonuses you'll want to cover it are using up plenty more.

All right, we got nothing good from that side of the mirror, what can we do now?

It turns out the red X has turned into a hole! Where "glass ends and mirror begins" is a question for the ages- and that's not something we get an answer to.

There's a wall to blow up here.

...Oh.

All right, how well do we know our cute little bomb girl?

...The first disguise with Kooper was pretty subtle, but these four... are far less so.

These two are at least kinda funny about it.

Bombette really can't stand dealing with dupes who don't try very hard to fake.

They say this as if I'm not whacking them.

Now comes the part where we have to go through and whack each one.

And all of them think they did a good job.

And I'd deserve it.

I think, if you hit Bombette, you get into a battle with whatever Duplighosts are still around. Despite how easy it is, I don't think I've ever seen anyone go for it- I think it's faster to hammer all the idiots.

It also gets us a kiss on the cheek. I think Bombette's the only partner who does that in this game.

This particular path has the Red Key.

And with that, there is no reason to go back to the blue door. Nothing but forward! Imagine if you had to go all the way back to the blue door to cross between the glass, though- that would be awful. I wonder if this break in the glass was a later addition, though.

This room features three White Clubbas, standing quite stationary along a narrow bridge, on one side, and a statue of Clubba on his opposite.

Annoyingly, you can't quite First Strike these guys.

They even speak, for what little characterisation they get.

This is a Gray Magikoopa. He's one of the magicians in the Koopa clan. Those gray robes aren't very flashy, but they're kind of cool. Max HP: 11, Attack Power: 3, Defense Power: 0. He can use magic to make his companions transparent. We can't attack enemies that are transparent. Let's try to beat 'em before that becomes an issue, what do you say?

...Oh hey, you're new. Grey Magikoopa (Lv. 21) is the last and most remote of the coloured Magikoopa clan, you can only find these guys here in Paper Mario 64. Their spell allows them to make enemies intangible for a turn, so they can hurt you, but you can't hurt them. Like a Repel Gel, and it actually lasts a few turns, too. Kill on sight.

Some more FP seemed like an apt decision, with all the Fire Shells I'm doing in here.

...Wow, that's the temper tantrum.

Two of them and a healer.

...For some reason, the Magikoopa decided to hit me with his wand instead of doing magic. It's not like the Clubbas were on full health, I did Fire Shell them

Well then, let's show him the error of his ways.

By the way, don't forget the third one at the end of the hallway, blocking the door. Don't think you're done just because the bridge is done.

Understandable. You won't mind if I teach you a different lesson?

Three of you and a Def buffer.

Yeah, I don't think I'm sitting through that.

Now we can pass through the mirror world.

And immediately we get another way through. This one at least involves a puzzle, but at least we'd only have to Blue Door once if that gap in the Red Door wasn't there. Wouldn't have been awful.

There's no hint, but once you go through the door on the other side, you'll see a cracked wall here.

There's a White Clubba patrolling the real world, and a Duplighost, not in disguise, marching in lock-step in the mirror world.

...A lot of Duplighosts.

Transform, transform...

Dangit, got some headbutts.

Of course it's the one I damaged first.

Well, that could've been more helpful.

Triple Dip (3 BP) allows the use of three items in one turn if you're willing to spend 6 FP. Double Dip was already pretty situational as it was, what are you using three items on? Maybe three Shooting Stars for 18 damage on a particular superboss battle, but that requires you having three Shooting Stars- and the inventory spaces to accommodate it.

Blowing up the switch is how you switch sides. It's not too hard, but it does get kinda involved.

...That didn't go as planned.

...I assume this is a second try, Bombette looks a little closer.

The next room sees Duplighosts in the mirror, moving out of pace with Mario.

The Duplighosts in the mirror will Shell Toss Kooper in this hole, suggesting you do the same.

If you do so- and if you do so from about the same position as the ones in the mirror- he won't come back out. For a few seconds.

And out bursts... a whole menagerie of characters.

Did you think the Bombette bit was funny? Want to see it done but even more obviously dumb? These Duplighosts have perfectly copied the speech mannerisms of completely different people.

He says, the only one that doesn't have arms.

Kooper is trying his hardest not to roll his eyes (way they're attached, he's probably not keeping them if he does) and hoping Mario is able to pierce this brilliant disguise.

"Back in my day, I was a super dooper kooper!"

In copying Luigi, this one also thinks Kooper and Mario are brothers. Or is really committing to the bit.

Well then...

They all praise you for your keen deduction skills.

This one seems to think he was doing a good job. Luigi.

This is the only scene that explicitly acknowledges the fact those disguises did not function as designed. Well, also if you talk to him while hammering.

Mario! Ow! You did that on purpose, didn't you!? That's just plain mean!

If you hammer Kooper, he knows it's not because you're too thick to pick him out of a crowd, and blames you accordingly.

Lots of doors in this room!

...Nothing in the south door except a giant statue of a Dino Rhino. Dino Rhinoes were enemies in Super Mario World with a fairly charming design all told, but they never showed up again outside this game, Colour Splash, and a cameo as an NPC in Origami King. Paper Mario- modern Paper Mario- has done more for this enemy than three decades of Mario.

Rex, the tyrannosaurus counterpart, barely made out much better, being seen only in the early Mario & Luigi games, Super Princess Peach and a few extra cameos in various backgrounds. I want my dinosaurs, dammit!

Ultra Boots to get this Maple.

And find out there's a Star Panel underneath.

If we try going right, there's a bridge to cross with Kooper. Thankfully, no more Duplighosts.

Just a narrow bridge.

Since we cannot cross through the mirror world past that room with the bad Duplighosts, we're going to need this one.

Proof of concept, there's no opening this side. I feel like there should be something in here.

If you remember your parallels, the Maple in the normal side is matched by a Jammin' Jelly on this one.

And a Star Panel underneath.

There's a Dino-Torch statue over on this side, and since it's a smaller one, we can push it over.

And head down to the basement for some goodies.

And getting hit on the head.

...+Def and a healer. This is one of those fights that could go bad fast.

And Multibounce didn't go my way, it looks.

Mega Bomb it is.

That's a heal.

And that is me learning I really shouldn't be Multibouncing.

Right, you two will stay if you're working together, I don't want to be Clubba'd. Thankfully, they don't like buffing each other. Or themselves.

Now, how to do this without both of them running away.

...Not like that. I should just knock this guy down so I can ground AoE.

This is not worth the Star Points.

This is how I'm ending the fight.

P-Up D-Down (2 BP) is another point of Power to add to your belt, if you're confident in your ability to go around with -1 Def. This isn't Mario & Luigi, where you can pretend that's just +1 damage if you're good at the game (that was All or Nothing). You can play with this on, if you have good blocks and plan your items out, but it's a risky call and three Atk buffs covers everything so far.

And thankfully, like the last time we got Up/Down, that tells us to go back to the real world and see magic happen. The Dino Rhino statue has moved with the Dino-Torch.

It was a Red Magikoopa on this side.

And another instance of me proving I should not be Multibouncing.

All that buffing...

And it's oneshot by a kaboom.

So long.

And there's the fancy key needed to get past the traditionally locked door.

Both locks break, not that it matters.

Say hello to this room. This big puzzle uses both the real world and the mirror world so extensively, they just cut the pretenses and don't actually have the pane of glass in the middle of the room. I know some people who didn't check for that.

We can push the statues of these Dino Rhinos around, but only in the direction the statue is pointing.

Our goal is to push them onto these panels up here. You may notice the Dino moving alongside in the real world.

This is an Albino Dino. He looks exactly like that stone statue over there. He's a guard for this palace. I never thought you could talk to these creatures! Wouldn't it be something if we made friends with these guys? You know, it seems that they like facing us when we talk to 'em.

Albino Dino is a white recolour of Dino Rhino, appearing only in this game, and not even in combat- although there are stats for it if you did (Max HP 8, Atk 4, Def 4). You can talk to them, but all they say is this exact line.

And change the direction they face to do so.

Imagine leaving the room to make these pushes.

This solution does it in three talks, although it does involve pushing this guy over half the length of the room. I'm sure there are better solutions, but this is the one I usually take.

Solve the puzzle, and this door rolls out the red carpet down some invisible stairs.

Up we climb.

...Yup. That's a boss incoming.

Here's my Badge setup. No idea what Quake Hammer was for- OK, it is helpful in one situation, but I really should've picked something to attack a boss with.

My vote goes to D-Down Jump, if I switched out Speedy Spin. This may be the fight where forgetting that's an option cost me most.

Time for the suspended mystery bridge.

On our way to the boss of the chapter... who is...

...A crown, a pair of eyes, and a cool suit. That ruffled collar is a thing.

Aside from the pure "what the hell am I even looking at, this guy does not look like a Mario enemy", the Crystal King doesn't get much. He's powerful, we have no idea what he is, and that's about all. For a chapter that liked to take the mickey out of the JRPG genre, this guy is super JRPG.

This is the Crystal King. He's one of Bowser's main guys. I don't know how he managed to take over this palace, but... Max HP: 70, Attack Power: 6, Defense Power: 2. He'll attack you by summoning and launching Crystal Bits. The power of each attack is 4. The number of times he attacks equals the number of Crystal Bits he's deployed. He'll also try to freeze you whenever he can. When his HP gets low, he may try to divide and conquer. The power of this attack is 8. You can hurt him only by attacking his real body. If you don't know which one's the main body, you should attack all of them. Pretty brilliant, eh?

The Crystal King (Lv. 85) is all stat, all business. 70 HP to chew through, 2 Def to make it past, and an assortment of chilly effects. At the start of the fight, he will spam his Crystal Bits, but he'll eventually give it up and begin fighting directly. When he does, his main attack is a bolt of ice that hits for 6 damage with a chance of Freezing, as well as dividing into multiple copies to make himself harder to hit. He can also heal twice for 20 HP a pop, just to be a pain. He is considered an Ice enemy, so he takes +2 damage from fire. For what that's worth.

The Crystal King's theme, Freeze!, suits the mystique of the thing perfectly, in addition to being a cool boss theme.

This is a Crystal Bit. Basically, Crystal Bits are just pieces of the Crystal King. You can drop 'em with ease. Their Max HP is 1 and they're only dangerous when the Crystal King spews 'em out. Their defense power is 0. These guys are pretty weak. They'll keep coming, though, until you've finally beaten the Crystal King.

Crystal Bit (Lv. 1) is the same no matter which one you're looking at. If the Crystal King does not have any, he will spawn three to prepare himself for an attack on his next turn. If he has some, he will inhale them and spit them all out in rapid succession for four damage each.

The shape of the Crystal Bits makes a case for resembling those of Culex, a superboss in Super Mario RPG. If the Crystal King is intended to evoke the feeling of a non-Mario JRPG boss, the Crystal Bits are his Crystals. Thankfully, they don't have their own turns and powerful magical spells. This is a required boss, not a superboss.

Next turn, I Tattle the King. Not sure I needed to know the Bits, but I remembered them either having HP or Def. They do not.

Twinkle twinkle little star.

And here he is making more.

Mario is doing 10 damage a bounce, that's nice. Could've been 14 with D-Down.

Here he is spitting chunks.

And doing five damage with P-Up D-Down.

Turbo Charge is a must.

17 damage a turn with the combo of Turbo Charge Mario and Watt. This is encouraging- with D-Down, I outpace the healing.

Of course, he's doing 12-15 damage back, but...

We've got him on the ropes already. That's what happens when you need a turn to charge.

Of course you do.

Of course you do.

You can't heal forever.

...But you can do that.

Well, it worked last time.

Not that he attacks with his next move. Instead, he splits into three... flying Crystal Kings. He can either do this or do it on the ground. The ground version is the one thing Quake Hammer was for.

Spiny Surge will be our plan.

Only the real one will take the hit.

That's us out of the ice.

I may want one of these.

...Not again.

The things I do to shut this whole mess down.

And back to bouncing.

So long, ice bolt.

I can take you.

...Well...

I think Kooper deserves the kill. Now you're a real explorer! You want his crown as a trophy?

No level up, but we get a free full heal anyway.

Goodbye. Wheeeeeee!

You needed a better final resort than... whatever that was, Bowser.

Mario has saved the last Star Spirit, Kalmar, from the Crystal Palace at the edge of the world. Now, with the seven Star Spirits together, he has the power to challenge Bowser... and the Star Rod. At last, it is time for Mario's showdown with Evil King Bowser. Can Mario rescue Princess Peach and recover the Star Rod? Or will wishes forever go ungranted?

Next time: Answering that question.