Rab's Side Story is going to take us... places. Although you might find that the Kingdom isn't exactly famous for dreams.
Well, for starters, Rab's been conked out. Somehow.
I'm not sure what kind of amnesia this is, but the only thing Rab doesn't really remember is how he got here and why. Everything leading up to that seems perfectly fine- although following up Erik's loss of memory with this is certainly entertaining.
Only Rab would wake up in the whereever and find a bunnygirl waiting for him.
He has to actually check, for some reason.
He doesn't name a name, but I imagine the idea is that this is one model in particular he's seeing to be so particularly flabbergasted.
I... don't think Rab's got any other options.
...Really going there, aren't we?
At this point, we just have to run after the one person nearby and...
...All of a sudden we're in a place that does exist.
No wonder Rab can't keep up.
Welcome home, grandpa.
Our mysterious companion throws a compliment Rab's way-
And he notices that's he's been thrown back into his old outfit from days gone by.
Yes, this is the same outfit the player can get in Act 1 from the Mini Medal exchange. The fact the player might be wearing them doesn't seem to have occurred to the game, which kinda robs this moment of a bit of its wonder.
Oh, this is going to be one of those visions.
Rab's Side Story is going to largely occur within the halls of Dundrasil-Gone-By.
And, despite Rab's complete and utter confusion, he is a tangible presence in the castle, capable of doing things, and all the NPCs scattered around react to him. I suspect that this is part of the nature of this vision, and we are not actually present at these events as they would have happened years ago.
At this point in the "timeline", Rab is actually serving as King. With that said, the game would rather keep control over our movements just the same.
Just because he's King doesn't mean Rab doesn't have time for the kids running around the castle.
Sometimes, when you need to direct the player to a place their character knows quite well, it can be a good idea to make the hint NPC be the one in need of directions. The same information reaches the player, even if they weren't the ones being explicitly taught.
...Who "he" is and what "it" is are kept secret from us. Which I hope means good news.
The gossip is certainly thick with this one.
...I'll admit, it's probably more freshly polished because of the nature of this whole scene. I dunno, magic.
Oh, picky, picky, picky...
(We never meet Rab's wife, but considering he has a daughter, she must exist. It takes a certain kind of woman to marry him, but she does seem to have passed on long before Dundrasil's destruction.)
Anyway, speaking of Rab's daughter-
Rab has been instructed to take an audience with her and this fellow.
Rab, having lost them both sixteen years ago, has absolutely no idea what the correct way to react is.
Irwin, although confused by the outburst, ploughs on with the speech he intended to give. I suspect this is largely because of the nature of Rab's visit, but it would probably be what Irwin would do if this was what actually happened. He's anxious as hell right now.
Rab gets a lid on his confusion and gets back into his old formal training quickly enough. Rab was actually retired before Dundrasil fell, so I'm not sure how long it's been since he was King, but that doesn't seem to have made him miss more than two or three beats.
Irwin blurts out what he's come here for- this is the formal proposal between Erdward's parents.
This might be a bit much for poor Rab.
Especially after knowing Irwin as his son-in-law (and also dead) for so long, being thrust back into seeing Irwin still somewhat scared of him is one massive mental leap to make.
...
Quite frankly, I know this is not real, but I'm afraid of causing a time paradox if I say no.
I wonder if this is what Rab actually thought at the time or if Rab can't think of Irwin as anything but his son-in-law anymore. Somehow, I feel like it's more the latter.
Now then, that's a man you'd hope marries your daughter. Shame about the rest of the circumstances, but he did his best within them.
Everyone starts cheering- this is what they were all gossiping about.
...And then everyone vanishes.
What now, then? This isn't the destruction of Dundrasil...
Apparently there is more yet to come.
All right, so what's going on now?
Yeah, I think that was a bit presumptive of a guess, Rab.
...Father-to-be?
Ever since the day I ceded the throne to young Irwin, the lad has poured his heart and soul into making Dundrasil the greatest kingdom it can possibly be.
He was never raised as royalty, and I must admit, I shared some of my subjects’ doubts about whether or not he was truly suited to rule at first.
But now I know I made the right choice. He soon gained their trust and respect- and mine as well. The entire nation is united behind him.
My dear Eleanor has made a very fine choice of husband indeed- which means I can get on with enjoying my retirement!
Good to hear out of Irwin. Although that makes it sound like there's a nice healthy chunk of time between Irwin proposing to Eleanor and having Erdward. While I don't object to this family plan, we don't actually know how long this time is. Not helped at all by the fact that Irwin, Eleanor and Rab all only have the one model to depict them, with no redesigns to depict them as older or younger. It would make sense that at least one of these characters should have a younger model at the ready, but considering there's no reason for them in the vanilla game (Irwin and Eleanor's models appear in Act 2), I can forgive their absence.
Rab has a comical animation involving jumping to take down books and put them back in place.
Oh dear. That's going to be unpleasant.
There's some valuables to find here in Dundrasil, as weird as that is. This has further weirdness associated with it- Dundrasil is actually a location Erdward can visit later on in the game. These items are the same ones Erdward can find- ie if Rab picks something up now, Erdward won't find it later.
Picking them up with Rab is purely optimal, since Erdward finds Rab before he gets to Dundrasil.
Irwin wants to ask a favour of Rab.
Rab takes a moment to muse on what time it is. The fact this is Erdward's birthday will make a very interesting story- aside from the fact Rab already saw this. To see it in light of already knowing Erdward will make an interesting day, that's for sure.
Irwin's got no ideas for Erdward's name. As long as we don't think of anything stupid like Eleven or Eleanorson.
Irwin asks Rab to do some King stuff while he's busy brainstorming. You don't have to do all of it, but I'm not entirely clear on how much of it you have to do before Irwin clears his head.
He says "two", but there's parts to both.
There's three messages in the inbox on this front. If you start this, the game invites you to do all three in a row, and I've never done it partially.
There are a handful of NPCs who have odd jobs for Rab to do to lend a helping hand. I think I counted three, but the only real indicator you have on how many there are is Rab and Irwin talking about "do you still have stuff to do?"
Also, Rab's going up in my estimation for pioneering this idea.
Irwin will be by the fountain either when we find everyone to help or give up.
These Drasilian guards seem pleased with Rab taking back control, at least for a little bit. As cool as Irwin was, Rab seems to be even more respected.
Also, it's neat how the Drasilian guards get the same designs, but different colours to the Heliodorian, Gallopolitan and Sniflheimer guards we've seen thus far, despite them only getting a chance to show off in flashbacks.
The three messages will be from three different countries and have three different degrees of problems. And yes, the scope of the three problems is significantly different- although all three definitely need a King to lend a hand.
The chancellor seems to like having Rab around too.
Our first guest visited personally, and...
Snorri? I don't think he's ever identified as Snorri, and he has the same issues about potential aging, but I could see it being the case.
Someone's gone and stolen the Blue Orb, and Sniflheim wants suggestions on how to solve that problem.
Four culprits is no mean feat. Although I'm not sure how you get that far and no further in a way outside help would help with.
From here, we can choose our suspicions about the culprit. The way this works is that your answers will retroactively be the correct ones, it's just your opinion about what answers you want to give.
There are two questions to answer, both with two options each. Presumably, these map onto the four culprits Gustaf has selected.
Stealing the Blue Orb for money is ridiculous: who is going to buy that? It's far too recognisable. And you probably couldn't sell it for sapphires. It is, however, high profile, and that's an attractive proposition for thieves who want to prove themselves as particularly skilled. Not even necessarily for others- just for yourself, that's pretty encouraging.
So what were the means the thief used to pull off this heist?
Well, no matter what disguise you're wearing, walking up to the Blue Orb and taking it is going to be suspicious no matter what. No, it would help his cause more if the thief... opened up a few illicit passages, if you catch my drift.
Once you've made your picks, Rab comes up with his idea of what the thief is like.
And offers a suggestion on how to catch the thief assuming he is correct. When it comes to a thief who did it with something to prove, this is actually a pretty clever trick- even if the thief suspects a trap, their pride will get them to solve the problem before long.
If you say "No" here, you're allowed to choose a different path. There is content based on the outcome of this decision later, so you cannot just say "No" and read everything all at once.
...That our culprit is a professional thief who did it for the money!
So what I recommend doing is lining up the suspects, telling them that it turns out the Blue Orb isn't worth a thing, and taking a good, hard look at their faces when ye do so. Once they hear that they risked everything for a useless bauble that isnae worth a penny, the thief's face will turn to thunder, ye can be sure of it!
...That our culprit is an experienced professional thief!
Go back and line up your suspects. Tell them that the orb they stole was a fake, and that whoever took it must have been an amateur and a fool! Any innocent party will surely see the funny side, but one person certainly won't crack a smile- the veteran whose skills ye've called into question.
...That our culprit is a mischievous monster that can change its form at will!
What ye need to do is line up the suspects and sprinkle a wee bit of holy water on their heads. Yer culprit'll sing like a canary rather than put up with that!
The alternative conclusions Rab can draw. I feel like number 2 is the only advice I would give in the same situation- number 1, I feel like a thief could've figured out on their own pretty quick, and number 3 feels like a leap in logic so massive it's clearly the joke answer.
Now then, next question. (From the datamine, I think you're allowed to move around if you say "No", but that still doesn't clear up whether you can finish this part of the story without reading all three missives. I'd actually assume not.)
The Sultan of Gallopolis will be the next person we help, but his problem (the most urgent one) was not one that allowed him to come personally.
Your Majesty, I trust that this message finds you well. Word of the continued triumphs and glories of your kingdom reaches us on a daily basis. In truth, I write seeking your counsel for this very reason- as you may know, the sultanate has suffered a prolonged heatwave. The land is parched, and we fear for this year's harvest. As ruler of a realm of plenty, I beseech you, share with us the secrets of your prosperity, that we might avert disaster. I await your reply by return of rider. Your humble servant, the Sultan of Gallopolis.
So yeah- Gallopolis needs to figure out some way to recover from a bad harvest.
I can only imagine.
Rab starts his ruminations by pointing out that Dundrasil hasn't really had anything comparable.
"Unfailingly gracious" kinda makes me think more of sucking up than of being polite and tactful, but I feel like the word can describe both.
These are the two descriptions that Rab can come up with for what the advice will be. In isolation, the answer seems pretty obvious- Gallopolis did not last as long as it has without trying all the conventional wisdom, now is the time for thinking outside the box.
Rab dictates his message for the chancellor to write down.
My Dear Sultan, I understand your kingdom is suffering a bout of searingly hot weather. No doubt sales of ice cream and swimsuits are going through the roof! Of course, I do not wish to make light of your predicament. I simply wish to show you that by changing the way you think about something, you can turn a crisis into an opportunity. What I suggest is that you inspire your people to think of radical new ways of cooling down. Leave it to their imaginations and see what they come up with- hopefully it will involve swimsuits, and lots of them!
...Who left Rab in charge of coming up with a solution? ...Wait, never mind, that was me.
And that's just even more ridiculous on top of it, but I assume this not supposed to come off as ridiculous as the joke answer we got.
Let's, uh... try something more royal.
I went with the exact opposite message. I wasn't sure I trusted Rab to pull off "unfailingly gracious" or "think outside the box" if that is what he came up with them combined.
My Dear Sultan, I understand that your country is at risk of a terrible drought. Well, fear not, for help is at hand. We would be only too happy to open our storehouses and supply you with our surplus grain to make up for any shortfall you may suffer. Naturally, we would expect no compensation. For you are our brothers and sisters, and were we ever in the same position, we would expect no less in return. If we cannot come to one another's aid in times of strife, then truly we are lost.
One of my favourite things about pre-capitalism society is that they don't have capitalism. Shame about the feudal lords and the chivalry poisoning, but hey, doing good because magnanimity is beneficial for all concerned beats the snot out of squeezing every last gold piece out of a disaster relief effort.
That should do it.
My Dear Sultan, I understand that your kingdom is at risk of a severe drought. Put simply, this is a test from on high, and any ruler worthy of the name must be able to rise to such a challenge. I do not wish to sound unduly harsh, but rather than asking the rulers of other kingdoms for help, you must look closer to home. You must believe in yourself and in your people. Lead them. Inspire them. Encourage them to till the soil with all their hearts, and new crops shall surely spring forth given time. But you must be strong- you must be a beacon in this time of need.
My Dear Sultan, I understand that your kingdom is at risk of a severe drought. Put simply, there are limits to what one can do in such a situation. Might I suggest that you take a leaf out of the book of the tribes of ancient times? I speak, of course, of the sacred ritual of the rain dance. Only the chief of the tribe- you, in other words- may perform it. Belly dance for three days and three nights without rest or sustenance before the den of a dragon. Then, and only then, might you be saved.
...I think I owe the joke answer an apology. Yeesh. No one trust Rab with drought-prevention advice, that was the lesson here. "Tell the people to toil harder". Why, I oughta give you a paddle directly to your fundament...
Pugilistic refers to fist-fighting.
The chancellor requests we choose one of these three people to represent Dundrasil in an Octagonian fighting competition.
We've got a very traditional choice over here. If you were going into a fight, you'd almost definitely pick this guy first.
This guy... no one's really sure why he's here, but he seems to be literally incapable of losing, so we could do worse.
The ursa minor is indeed a literal ursa minor and not a man in a bear suit (or a "bear" in the slang sense), but he claims to be a good monster.
By the way, yes, the game will allow you to choose the chancellor as your representative. The only real clues you have are that both prior setups have had four outcomes and the chancellor is available for conversation when you're set loose to walking around the throne room to make your choice. He kinda ruins the surprise by immediately jumping to the conclusion and not hiding behind some other generic message- perhaps you'd have to talk to him a second time to get him to realise you were serious about picking him? I dunno, this way's good too.
I've had to turn down all three of the other to show off all the dialogue, but this one's pretty great.
Gah, make yer mind up, will ye! Ye got me all worked up there! Well, ye'll regret not pickin' me, I'll tell ye that for nothin'.
Oh. I don't blame you, to be honest. I mean, who picks a ninety-seven-pound weakling to represent their kingdom? Ah, well. I guess my luck finally ran out...
Grrr... Oh well. I suppose I'll just have to grin and bear it. This is meant to be a tournament for humans, after all. They're welcome to it...
I went with the ursa minor. My personal reason for this is, well, I'm a DQV fan at heart. You always put your faith in your monsters.
If you say no at this point, the chancellor actually kinda gets fed up for a second, before cutting off his (presumably) angry rant to tell you to make up your mind.
Ach, for-! Ahem... Very well, Your Majesty. Then could I trouble you to make another selection?
Well, actually... he does this if you picked one of the humans who volunteered.
...I thought as much. Then would you be so good as to begin the selection process again?
He doesn't seem to have a high opinion of choosing the bear.
Thank goodness for that! I should have known it was simply your roguish sense of humour! Now, if you could apply yourself to the serious business of selecting the finest fighter...
And is relieved as hell he wasn't picked himself.
But I like the bear. I will not hear any argument against the bear.
Amazin'! I won't let ye down, I promise! I'll tear those daft wee nyaffs limb from limb and do Dundrasil proud, just you wait and see!
Very good, Your Majesty. Victory for Dundrasil is assured! All we need to do now is await our triumphant victor's return!
Woo-hoo! Seems my luck hasn't run out yet! Thank you so much for giving me this opportunity, Your Majesty! I'm going to cross my fingers and pray myself silly from now until the day of the tournament!
Marvellous! Let us hope that fickle fortune will favour us on the day of the tournament!
Noooooo! I, I mean, really, Your Majesty? You jest, surely? Yes, of course you do! ...Don't you? Please tell me you're joking...
B- I... (sigh) If that is your decision, then far be it from me to question it... (gulp) I shall gird my loins, flex my muscles and... enter the ring with the most brutal warriors in all the world... (whimper)
The bear is, of course, the best one.
The inbox has now hit zero.
And now we are invited to find and solve the problems of everyone else.
I reserve the right to criticise him for the Gallopolis solutions. He'll actually say this regardless of what you did. Well... sort of.
It seems you have discharged your royal duties with aplomb, Your Majesty. King Irwin will be pleased. Might I suggest that you go and inform him that your work is done? And may I also say that it has been an absolute pleasure to witness your fine regal mind at work today. It was just like old times!
The game is prepared for you having solved all the problems elsewhere before doing the stuff on the throne.
This actually counts as one of the tasks: We are asked to complete a short quiz to show Rab's mighty intellect.
There are five questions, each of which is True or False. These questions are actually... somewhat interesting.
True. We never meet Rab's older siblings, and although this is the easiest question for Rab, this is probably the hardest question for the player.
False. That would be the Blue Orb. Purple is the royal treasure of Zwaardsrust.
True. The Drasilian sovereign sells for 1000 gold coins, the shilling 100. (The shilling is the bronze piece, the sovereign the gold).
False. "But what about Prince Faris?" I hear you ask. Flashback sequence, he hasn't been born yet- and even if he has, it's probably too early to tell if the doting is excessive.
True. Zwaardsrust is destroyed at this point in the timeline, leaving Dundrasil, Heliodor, Gallopolis and Sniflheim.
He'll say this even if you guessed wrong on every single one. He does, however, have unique responses for each wrong answer.
B-But Your Majesty, surely you jest! You cannot seriously have forgotten how many siblings you have? No, you are merely teasing me, I am certain of it. I know you have always enjoyed a good laugh, but I would humbly request that next time you take my questions seriously, and answer truthfully to the very best of your ability.
It's good... but it's not quite right! The name of the famed orb handed down through generations of the Sniflheim royal family since time immemorial is, of course... the Blue Orb! I know you are trying to conceal the truth about the fathomless depths of your knowledge by deliberately giving me wrong answers, but there is no need to be so humble, Your Majesty!
I'm afraid that was incorrect. Are you sure you aren't doing this on purpose, Your Majesty? All I wish is to see your towering intellect at work. I hope that you will oblige me next time by proving that you do in fact know the answers.
Oh dear, Your Majesty! Surely you are aware that the Sultan has not yet been blessed with a child? It seems you are unwilling to give free rein to your immense intellect. I very much hope the next time you take on this challenge, there will be no such restraint.
Such a shame! He falls at the final hurdle! I suppose even a man of learning such as yourself is not infallible. But I sense that you have not shown me the true extent of your formidable wisdom. Should you wish to pick up the gauntlet once more, I shall be only too happy to pepper you with stumpers!
I wonder if he knows it's a guarantee to answer the questions correctly if you give the answerer infinite tries and feedback.
For the quiz, we receive a Seed of Magic. There's a few tangibles in the rewards here.
I feel like the actually difficult DQ monster lore I know is dependent on out of universe context: He's not going to ask us which game Ursa Minor first appeared in, he doesn't know what a "game" is.
Poor dear. I thought this was a call-forward to a scene from the vanilla game, but no, this is actually hinting at something within the Side Story.
Foiled again.
I know they're kids, but there's the "he'll do great things as a boy, but she'll just be cute as a girl" thing. What's Eleanor up to on a good day?
Well, that's a good reason to blockade these stairs.
...Well, that's worrying.
A "lover of good food", although perhaps a word that makes him sound less like a logarithm might've been a better choice.
On the other hand, what an asshole. (Yes, the maid in question is the one standing right there.)
Well, we can't have that. No matter the cause, a solution is necessary.
The goal here is to find a pepper substitute that can make the meal work.
There's a lot of places to check.
Don't worry, it's probably less your fault than the butler is saying it is.
...I think the fact he's living in a castle alone is going to set the impressions pretty solidly in place.
I went to Rab's room, wondering if there was anything in here Rab could use for pepper (considering that maid in the background is still sneezing), and I found... this.
Well, if we cut it up into pieces and turned it into a different meal, the tasteless decorations won't matter anyway. Besides, it takes it away from Rab.
I feel like you could've put a little more effort into verifying it'd work before rewarding us.
...On the other hand, Rab doesn't... really want this, does he? In numbers, this'd probably turn Rab's claws into a thing to be feared, though.
...You wot, mate?
I mean, clearly, whoever made the pie in the first place deserves some credit. Or, well, most of it.
That's the spirit.
This continues to astound me.
This knight doesn't seem to have gotten the memo that he's now been fed, though.
(sniff sniff) Aye, this plant's leaves have a pungent pong alright. I'm pretty sure ye could dry them and use them to cook with. They'd be sure to add a wee bit of spice to the mix.
Hmm... I've a feeling I read somewhere that the berries from this plant are meant to taste a wee bit like pepper...
...The datamine only has these two suggestions, for a plant in the courtyard and a potted plant in the hallway before the throne room, if memory serves. Is there seriously not a fourth choice in pepper substitute? The leaves are the "correct" ingredient, as far as I can tell.
Thanks to your superior culinary insight, we managed to come up with an original new twist on neeps and tatties for the guards' dinner.
Although the berries didn't go too badly either. Both the leaves and the berries are called "neeps and tatties" and I have never heard that phrasing elsewhere. They appear to be mashed turnips and potatoes of some description, respectively, although a very heavily English (more specifically Scottish) turn of phrase to describe them. The sort of thing that means you get a lot of unhelpful results looking it up yourself.
Of course, of course... (Note to self, check who this woman is.)
This is the third matter that requires Rab's aid, and one I actually haven't done all that often- I never seem to notice it.
That's one way to get a proposal, I guess? This seems like it could backfire six ways to Sunday, though.
This is a startlingly vague description that applies to at least three people I spotted.
Fortunately, Rab doesn't muse about who he's thinking of to their faces.
This wasn't at the top of my list of concerns with this plan, but it was pretty high up there.
That was... relatively quick and painless, all things considering.
And of course I get a flower out of it.
The main reason I picked the maid is the fact there's a scorned maid of Dundrasil in the main story- probably not the same one, but if it is, this is a good way to avert that. Or cause it. I dunno.
There's a few other outcomes listed in the datamine, but I feel less confident in figuring out what to share from them- half of that comes down to the odd formatting of the site not making it obvious which text is associated with what. With that said, there's a man dressed in green with red hair somewhere around here- he's a florist, and it turns out the guard's pretty posy is one of the rarest flowers in the world, blooming once every thousand years. The florist offers to pay handsomely for it, although I don't think anything comes of it romantically.
That's everything to do in this part of the Side Story, so it's time to head on with the plot.
Irwin comes up with a name for his son and it's time to meet our hero.
Thank goodness we didn't have to wait any longer!
Irwin didn't know this ahead of time. I wonder if he had a name for both genders prepared.
I'm not sure how long it is until the Colloquy, but I don't think he gets too many days with his birth parents.
Ah, the irony. He probably screamed his voice out here, then.
This scene is actually a reference to DQV: That game opens with the birth of the main character. Your father, Pankraz, also has a name prepared- Madason (your mother's name is Mada). If you chose that name ahead of time, he would instead suggest the name Erdrick, which is the title given to the Heroes of Alefgard (DQs 1 and 3).
Irwin, incidentally, will suggest the name "Rickerd" if you picked Erdrick. While obviously "Erdrick" backwards in JP phonetics (although in Japan, Erdrick is known as Roto), this name does not appear to have much DQ history yet. It is, however, the name given to the Prince of Cannock for the Tact mobile port.
Both Mada and Eleanor choose a different name for their Hero, though- the name you selected for them. This probably hits Irwin harder, considering he just took the day off to brainstorm. Pankraz, on the other hand...
They're rather specific not to share the name for DQXI. DQV can use it more liberally, since it doesn't have voice acting.
I think Pankraz was a little more receptive to Mada's name, although Irwin's happy to hear the choice.
Aw look, he likes his dad.
They had to have at least one mention of the name, and Rab takes a loud, highly telegraphed sneeze to sneak it past the VA's desk.
He was playing with the pepper.
Sounds just fine. As long as Rab doesn't still have the sneezes, at any rate.
Kiddo's just as happy in Rab's arms, too.
...Oh yeah... I had, uh... forgotten that part.
And apparently, so has Rab. You can't blame us, we've been on the job for an hour or two, haven't we?
...Things only get more mysterious from here. Erdward was still pretty fresh out of the womb when the monsters attacked... there's not much more of a "forward" one can go from here.
— Song of Beginnings —
World Tree’s gift, first of many,
Bold, bright, blessed Luminary.
Thy light doth a shadow cast,
Lo, the Dark One- bleak, black, vast.
— Song of Prayer —
World Tree’s foot, a plea, a prayer,
Ringeth through the mountain air,
Babe is born, Tree’s will revealed,
“Serenica”—Luminary’s shield.
The book is filled with many more such important-sounding poems.
The Book of Erdwin is a collection of poems of great significance to Erdwin and his legacy. The first poem- the one listed as "Song of Beginnings"- will be plot relevant when we get to Dundrasil in the vanilla game, and I believe it's included in here for that reason. The Song of Prayer is not, though, and makes me kinda wonder what other poems are in there.
...This is...
Even the bunny girl is... on the move.
The bunny will "lead" Rab towards this room with a lot of teleporting around.
Someone appears to have started a celebration.
...
...
...ERDWARD?
And everyone else, too- the Sultan and Gustaf, even. But I don't see Carnelian among them.
It was a surprise for Rab, all right.
...I cannae believe it.
And clearly, Rab is still trying to figure things out himself.
Everyone's got a good word to put in to their good King.
Rab's proud of them for it.
Even the people who spend their time in the taverns!
The odd mish-mash of settings and moods has thrown Rab off-balance and gotten him all nostalgic for a kingdom that once was.
Erdward picks up on Rab's confusion.
You're blocked from leaving the party early by, of all things, a drunkard.
Ah, of course he does, doesn't he?
Erdward will run around the room, wanting to meet the three groups in each corner. This scene is payoff to the stuff in the throne room.
Starting off, the people of Sniflheim, and their business with the Blue Orb.
This was definitely one of Rab's finer moments.
It's hard to imagine, but Gustaf still has plenty of gas left in the tank himself- he won't die and leave Sniflheim to Frysabel until a year off, and this is still ten years before the canon game (assuming Erdward using his six year old model is supposed to mean that Erdward is six here).
Your choices in the "royal missives" section show their consequences here.
The Sniflheimers had a riddle at the ready fit the criteria Rab provided, and the fact that the thief solved it at all definitely helped him come to terms with exactly what might help him get a little more out of life- joining the scholars of Sniflheim and solving even more of their riddles.
In fact, here he is right now.
And Rab even gets a little credit for his work.
Thanks to you, we got our man, and I am happy to say that he confessed to everything and turned over a new leaf. He is now making use of his knowledge of thievery to protect our royal treasures!
When we told the suspects that the orb was a fake, the culprit was so shocked that he collapsed in a tearful heap on the floor! It really was the most marvellous ruse!
We put your cunning plan into action and revealed that the culprit was a monster in disguise. And that is not all- we even discovered an intriguing new use for holy water...
Gustaf's responses for the other three suggestions.
King Gustaf was good enough to allow me to guard the royal treasure house. It was the perfect way to make use of my experience as a thief- I knew just what to look for. I never thought a worthless criminal like me could be given a second chance, but it really happened. And I owe it to you, Lord Robert. Thank you.
Your understanding of the criminal mind is truly second to none. Who else would have thought of telling the suspects that the treasure they had stolen was a worthless bauble? Masterful, simply masterful!
In the course of sprinkling holy water on the suspects, we discovered that it has extraordinary moisturising effects. Now everyone in Sniflheim uses it to prevent chapped lips in winter! You will never guess who has now taken to using holy water as a moisturiser- none other than King Gustaf himself! Ever since Princess Frysabel told him that he looked old enough to be her grandfather, he has had something of a complex about his wrinkles.
And some of the other responses from his hangers-on. Sadly, the thief is not always among them. The "tell them the Orb is worthless" branch almost feels short-changed here.
When it comes to Gallopolis, Erdward is only interested in the performances. The problem we helped them with was rather dry, pun intended.
A promise...
The Sultan is very grateful for Rab's help way back.
This option might be boring, but it's certainly one with a promising result. Sometimes, it's the simple solutions that really stick.
Upon your wise advice, all Gallopolis pulled together and weathered the crisis as one. I believe this experience made us stronger as a people. We have a bright future ahead of us thanks to you!
I did as you counselled and performed a belly dance for three long days and nights. No sooner had I finished than the heavens opened! I shall never forget the relief that washed over me with the rain!
Your idea of devising new ways for my people to cool down was inspired! It led to a new dance craze that helped keep everyone's spirits up- oh, and swimsuit sales went through the roof!
...I feel bad about laughing, but I'm still really not sure on these ones. At least the rain dance worked.
A culture of lending aid where aid is required is one of the main benefits of chivalry. Although perhaps the message is weakened from on top of a balancing ball.
You can't say this isn't true.
We are the coolest dancers you will ever meet: the Snow Girl Showgirls! Frosty reception guaranteed! So, Lord Robert, what do you say? Would you like to celebrate your birthday in style?
<Yes>
Brrr! I feel a cold front approaching! Close your eyes, and stay frosty!
Come, let me cool your fevered brow, ♪
Hold still and I will show you how! ♪
Rab is engulfed in a blast of delightfully icy air!
So, how are you feeling, Your Highness? Suitably chilled, I hope? I do hope there are no icicles on your eyelashes! If ever you're feeling hot and bothered, we're the cure! We've come all the way from the burning desert to demonstrate the secret art of cooling down in even the hottest climes! Why not give it a try?
...On second thoughts, I think I'd rather not know.
There's a few Drasilian NPCs scattered around, too, but I wanted to be a little more focused on the plot here. I don't think a lot of them were all that interesting anyway.
Erdward is not at all terrified by the bear, incidentally. Despite the fact I'm fairly sure its hands are the size of him.
That's a great message to take out of it, though. The good monsters are always worth having around, no matter how the bad act.
Once you talk to Erdward in front of the Octagonians, the next cutscene will start and we'll get a sharp mood shift. Fortunately, you're still allowed to talk to the Octagonians (you could've done it beforehand anyway, but I quite liked the flow of showing our deeds to Erdward first). Let's just sneak them up ahead in line...
You did great. I assume.
...Hopefully your competitors felt the same way. I feel like the crowd wouldn't be on board if it was a mauling.
Anytime, big guy.
Oh, and I wanted tae thank ye again for pickin' me tae represent Dundrasil in the ring. I'm only sorry I didnae manage tae come back wi' the trophy. Guess I wasnae quite as tough as I thought... Still, I learned a lot from my experience at the School o' Hard Knocks, and now I'm a half-decent grappler, even if I do say so myself. And I owe it all tae you for givin' me my big break!
I remember when I went to the tournament, I was scared out of my wits- all the other fighters looked so tough. I thought I didn't stand a chance. But would you believe it, just before the tournament started, there was a torrential downpour and the whole thing was postponed. In the end, a lot of the toughest fighters caught colds and pulled out! I managed to win a bunch of my matches by default because my opponents didn't show up! What a result! In the end, I was runner-up and I never had to throw a punch! What a stroke of luck, eh?
Happy birthday, Your Highness! What a marvellous occasion! I hope you don't mind, but I invited some young ladies I befriended back in Octagonia. Ahh, I have so many happy memories of my time in the ring... When I first went, I presumed I would be fighting mano a mano, so to speak. Instead, it was a battle royale- a veritable free-for-all! I used my diplomatic skills and discretion to remain above the fray while my rivals slugged it out, and in the mad melee they were good enough to knock each other unconscious, leaving me to claim victory!
I didn't expect the bruiser to actually lose the tournament, even if I expected the luckster and the chancellor to have had better luck.
Anyway, back to normal, Erdward runs off to go pick up some cake.
Rab's come to wonder exactly what it is that's caused this day to occur. It's also remarkable that only the problems he solved on one day six years ago that have realised themselves here.
Sounds quite tempting.
Oh dear, Erdward's gone and dropped the cake he was hoping to give to Rab.
(Bonus points to Irwin, Eleanor and the maid in pink for reacting too.)
...I'm not sure how sold I am on "wee soldier".
Rab's ready to lend a hand all the same, though-
But it seems Erdward's trip has given him a bit of a flashback. To a completely different Erdward. In a situation that this boy might never encounter...
Rab remembers not only what he was doing, but why.
He has gone to seek tutelage from the woman who taught him to fight in the first place. Which must mean that he's found her.
Rab realises, with that in mind, that the correct course of action to take is to walk away from everything he ever dreamed of.
To Erdward's surprise.
Rab makes his goodbyes with Erdward.
And prepares to do the right thing.
Now, the time has come to have a chat with our enigmatic little bunny.
She'll even ask twice whether Rab wants to leave. Clearly she's a woman testing Rab's patience.
And asks a third time when the cutscene starts proper.
This might be a nice place to live, but there are thousands out there who are going through nightmares.
It's time for the actual training to begin.
"Taking" Rab to Pang might be a bit beyond her capabilities, however:
When she's already here.
Grand Master Pang is a character we will meet in Act 2, and to be quite honest, you might feel a vague sense of being lost coming up. I'll try and figure out a balance between explaining who she is and letting the game cover it later.
Rab's shocked Pang chose to do this. The bunnygirl act is the real surprise: Pang goes to great lengths to ensure the worthiness of her pupils. In both definitions of the word.
It's time to get rid of the illusion.
With that said... this place doesn't look all that less illusory.
This place will be explained in Act 2, but suffice it to say this is definitely not the usual sort of training grounds.
This slate is also present in the vanilla game, bearing the same message. I'd say it's more obvious what it's referring to there, but really, I don't actually understand what it is referring to other than "the Luminary will save the day".
She goes into more detail about the nature of this place in the vanilla game. It's not actually a natural element of the world, and Pang's presence here is not actually by design- she was sent here by something else. It's interesting they try to play it off as if it were her own idea.
And Rab has reason to be pleased to see the Grand Master again beyond just how long it's been since the two met- well, presumably. I wouldn't put it past Rab to take Jade to Angri La for a spell to teach her martial arts.
(If you were to bring Jade to Angri-La, her Party Chat line implies she hasn't been before.)
...While I agree that the test she gave Rab is applicable to a lesson she should teach, I'm not entirely sure I'm agreeing with the lesson she is teaching. She seems to be saying happiness is always to be avoided.
Then again, it's always the experts who stay training to maintain a keen edge.
Rab, by turning his back on Erdward and the Drasilians, passed the test.
That's not to say that's all Rab needs to do to prove himself worthy of Pang's expert tutelage.
So what's next?
Sounds fair. I mean, an expert needs to...
..."Only one way to make sure of that"?
Ah. I was wondering when we'd get to fight something.
The Naughty Stick is an instrument of discipline in Angri-La. From the name and appearance, one probably gets the gist on how they're used.
Rab's ready for a fight.
The legendary leader of the martial monks of Angri-La. Developed her hitherto-unseen dual-Naughty-Stick-wielding style whilst educating Rab in the ultimate secrets of her art.
??? family
[Roughly 10000] HP
999 MP
Grand Master Pang is a very versatile opponent, mastering many different techniques to throw against Rab and having three distinct phases to showcase.
First is the Swordsman Stance, giving her an Attack and Dodge boost. While in this phase, she'll focus on raining down punishment with her Naughty Sticks.
Nothing for it, let's get a little regen to help weather the incoming storm.
Well, that's not so bad...
Oh yeah, right.
Hawkeye Claw might be the way to go here.
Don't forget Rab can heal up.
Pang will occasionally throw out a sensual smile, an ability that tries to enthrall its target.
Despite the fact Rab has a weakness to it, mine somehow dodged the status. I was not expecting that.
All right, enough hiding behind your stance. Zammle it is.
Pang responds by switching to a spellcaster's stance, increasing her spell resistance while lowering her defence. She knows the spells Dazzle, Boom and Zammle.
With that said, lower defence, no evasion chance?
HARDCLAW!
...Ow. Maybe I could've sprung for a Skull Ring? Doubt it would've helped.
This particular ability allows her to wipe her debuffs, in case you thought that'd help.
She can also summon a tantamount as backup.
Hellish horses who form herds that canter in circles, kicking up ash and embers-a spectacle known as the Mephistophelian merry-go-round.
Tantamounts are from DQs 9 and 10, and they can use fiery breath, a damaging whinny with a chance for stun, and Frizzle. That stun chance is really going to sting here, but there's not much Rab can do about it now- not without ignoring Pang.
At the end of the fight, Pang abandons her stances and tries a new strategy: Charging and firing a powerful attack.
Best we... prepare for it.
Yeah, yeah, I heard you.
Pang... needs to do a lot of charging.
Aye, if only this actually gave Resilience. Or normal crit chance- it's just magical for Rab. Which is a shame, because Rab could probably use physical crit chance more than magical.
This ability, apparently called Metor Ranbu, is a powerful onslaught of strikes with the Naughty Stick. And Rab dodged two of them.
Even with, though, that took a lot out Rab.
Fortunately, Pang wasn't in the greatest shape either.
I'm not sure if it's intentional, but the fighting style Pang adopts- of opening with switching between various stances that change her weaknesses, before dropping her stance system and focusing on charging and firing her most powerful attack repeatedly- echoes heavily from an old IP the developers of Dragon Quest had a big hand in: Magus from Chrono Trigger. Pang doesn't really have any character traits of Magus to echo, just the fighting style, but it's certainly a similarity nonetheless.
For what it's worth, defeating Pang does not appear to be necessary to complete the Side Story? I've always beaten her myself, though.
Rab seems so dejected to hear Pang preparing to turn him away.
Pang, fortunately, doesn't stick with it. She's going to make sure Rab can do what he needs to stand against the Lord of Shadows.
It's time for Rab to learn some ultimate magic!
This is a massive discussion about the nature of the world Pang inhabits and what Rab had to do to get here that I'd rather not ruin ahead of time. The main takeaway here is that the training Rab would ordinarily be expected to do would take years, and Rab, as fit as he is, does not have that time left in his life. The man was retired decades ago. As such, Pang is going to take... "liberties".
And I'm sure Rab is going to regret saying that.
Rab takes a break in the action to comment that Pang's disguise as a bunnygirl was a bit... too convincing for him. That, and the whole "still enthralling him while fighting him" thing.
...
And that was more about Pang's sex life than I needed to know.
Yeah, about what one expects from Pang. I have no doubts this is easy from her, although we're fortunate enough to escape her training methods in gameplay- both as Rab and as Erdward.
Rab's buttocks are not so fortunate.
Lord Robert and the Kingdom of Dreams is, allegedly, a breather Side Story to fit between some of the higher intensity of Jade and Erik's Side Stories and the heavy burden that is Act 2 proper. The sedentary gameplay and pleasant atmosphere of Dundrasil is certainly rather welcome, considering how much Side Story content you have to get through between the fall of Yggdrasil and finding out what happens to Erdward (there's actually some vanilla content for the maingame before the Side Stories I won't be showing until after, because there was no better option).
With that said, this Side Story is also probably the hardest hitting. While Sylvando losing his massive reserves of self-confidence is one thing, it is quick to be chased away. Jade and Erik, while going through high-stakes situations and losing big, have very impersonal losses marred by the blatant sexualisation and strange plotting to get them to their Act 2 fates. Rab's Side Story really manages to hit hard in a single moment with Rab turning away from the memory of Erdward as he could've been. The tone of the Side Story as a whole kinda shifts once you realise just how unnatural this Dundrasil really was, and how easy it was to lose that big picture. With that said, a personal note: I kinda feel bad about the idea of a Drasilian Erdward. I'm not sure why, I can't picture him or Cobblestone without him having made it to his adopted family. While him losing Irwin and Eleanor was certainly a tragedy, I can't help but be of the opinion Erdward (and to some extent Jade) were "better off" finding new sides to themselves dealing with the aftermath. That probably colours my opinion of Drasilian Erdward.
Mechanically, this is certainly an intersting style of gameplay. Having several sidequests with branching paths, even if they were only a single stage and led to the same conclusion, in a Side Story must've been something the writers were rather passionate about when planning. The mixture of legitimate suggestions and joke answers is rather lovely, even if I'm not entirely certain about how the choices for the Gallopolis branch panned out. There's also the element of using the focus on so few elements as worldbuilding- Pang probably didn't build the world to be wholly self-sufficient, so of course Rab's birthday party is attended by the people he helped in the earlier vision, despite how ridiculous this would be in a real situation. I also noted Carnelian was absent from Rab's party- perhaps Pang deliberately excluded him and Jade so as to not prompt Rab into thinking about Mordegon. The realisation had to come from his own understanding of the vision's wrongness.
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